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Woman and Trees

Discovering the Elusive Truth and Falling in Love with Yourself

“Pleasure can be supported by an illusion, but happiness rests upon truth.” ~Sebastien-Roch Nicolas De Chamfort

In today’s world, we are bombarded day by day and moment by moment with images and messages of who we should be, what we should be doing, and exactly how we should be doing it.… Read More

Appreciating the Moment

Finding Life Through Death: How Loss Teaches Us to Appreciate More

“If you learn from a loss you have not lost.” ~Austin O’Malley

The police officer walked toward me, leaving the multi-car accident behind him as he placed a bloody wallet in my hand. He asked me to open it up and verify that this property was indeed my best friend’s, who also happened to be my only brother.… Read More

Meditating

Wabi Sabi: Find Peace by Embracing Flaws and Releasing Judgment

“Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.” ~Dalai Lama

Several years ago, a colleague and I were invited to give a presentation on mindfulness at our State Mental Health Conference. I was a novice and flattered to be asked.

Singing bowls, which are metal and look like a mortar and pestle, are useful tools in mindfulness practice.… Read More

jumping

How to Master the Art of Fear for a Life of Possibility

“Fear is inevitable, I have to accept that, but I cannot allow it to paralyze me.” ~Isabel Allende

Until the age of eleven, courage was just a seven-letter word to me. It meant nothing. I knew all about fear though. Those four letters pierced through every inch of my being.

I still remember the sheer terror of visiting a theme park.… Read More

Smiling Woman

5 Tips to Stop Making Comparisons and Feeling Bad About Yourself

“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” ~Steve Furtick

I remember one day when I was around six years old, my older brother came home from school with one of those star-shaped highlighters that had a different color on each point.… Read More

3 Lessons to Help You Find Peace When Fighting a Hard Battle

“He who has health has hope, and he who has hope has everything.” ~Proverb

August 3, 2001. I still remember it like it was yesterday. It was around six o’clock in the evening when she sat us down. Luther Vandross was singing in the background on the radio: “And it’s so amazing and amazing, I can stay forever and forever.… Read More

On Top of Mountain

Facing Life’s Big Challenges and Coming out on Top

“Life always waits for some crisis to occur before revealing itself at its most brilliant.” ~Paul Coelho

I will never forget that day.

It is still as clear in my mind as if it were yesterday.

My son was just a little over three. He was going to a mainstream kindergarten and, well, his teacher had very gently suggested we seek a professional’s help.… Read More

Man Thinking

Forgiving the Unforgivable and Ending Your Own Suffering

“Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” ~Malachy McCourtro

I was completely unprepared for the emotional hailstorm that bombarded me when, back in 2001, I learned that my wife had been having an affair with my best friend of twenty-plus years.

My normal, predictable life (which I absolutely loved, by the way) had been virtually shattered overnight.… Read More

Woman at Peace

How Acknowledging Your Anger Can Help You Forgive and Find Peace

“Genuine forgiveness does not deny anger but faces it head-on.” ~Alice Duer Miller

As an adult survivor of childhood sexual abuse at the hands of a relative, I had become accustomed to keeping secrets. Silence, I was taught, was a good thing. It protected people that I loved.

So for over a decade, I carried the dark and overbearing weight of my past in secrecy and in silence, believing I was the only one in the world who’d ever experienced such abuse—until I learned from a college workshop that one in four women and one in five men fall victim to sexual abuse by the time they are eighteen.… Read More

Take Up Space

Do You Take Up as Much Space as You Deserve?

“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” ~Maya Angelou

As a child, I got bombarded with the message that I was too much. Everywhere I turned, people said I was too loud, too smart, too heavy, too talkative, too impulsive, too intense, too happy, too forward, too silly.… Read More

Dark Day

6 Simple Personal Commitments to Overcome Low Self-Esteem

“Everything that happens to you is a reflection of what you believe about yourself. We cannot outperform our level of self-esteem. We cannot draw to ourselves more than we think we are worth.”  ~Iyanla Vanzant

You’re smart, funny, and genuinely good at heart.

You have ideas that could solve many of the problems you see around you.… Read More

couple

Loving Others Without Expecting Them to Fill a Void

“You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Conventional notions of what it means to love are populated with expectations for reciprocity that often get us into trouble. I know this personally, because whenever I have “freely” given my love, and it has not been rewarded with reciprocity, I have often come face to face with my resentment.… Read More

We Are All Connected

Preserving Kindness in a Busy World: We Are All Connected

“The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the grandest good intention.” ~Oscar Wilde

Three times in the last two months I have nearly been run over by a fellow shopper’s grocery cart. Each time the customer rushing closely behind me had to suddenly swerve and push past, clearly annoyed with the obstacle, which was me.… Read More

Sad Man

Today Can Be the Day You Turn Things Around

“In chaos, there is fertility.” ~Anais Nin

How did I get to this point?

This question pulsed through my brain repeatedly as I drove to my parents’ house in a state of complete exhaustion. My young daughter was strapped in the back seat, my pregnant belly pushing against the steering wheel, hot tears streaming down my face.… Read More

Sitting and reflecting

Reclaim Your Authentic Self: 4 Steps to Recover from Bullying and Abuse

When I was in fourth grade, a girl from another class bullied me. I was in the bathroom during class when I heard the door creak open and whoosh shut. There was silence for a moment, then the girl’s hands appeared on the top of the stall door, followed by her face.… Read More

Angry Face

Don’t Respond to Drama and Drama Won’t Come Back Around

“When you are not honoring the present moment by allowing it to be, you are creating drama.” – Eckhart Tolle

One day several years ago, I was fraught with anxiety over with how to handle an uncomfortable personnel situation at work. I had an employee that was borderline explosive and insubordinate.… Read More

Self Reflection

Get Some Perspective: 4 Ways to See Yourself and the World Differently

“Your outlook on life is a direct reflection on how much you like yourself.” ~Lululemon

Several months ago I wrote an article that sat for months without being published. A few weeks ago the editor emailed me to say how pleased she was with it and that it would post the following week.… Read More

Positive Mind

Becoming More Positive When Negativity Feels Instinctive

“Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power.” ~Shirley MacLaine

If you have ever felt the depths of depression, you know it’s not the same as being sad or having “the blues.” It’s the hopeless, overwhelming feeling of melancholy where nothing, not even the people you love, can pull you out.… Read More

Overloaded

Emotionally Overloaded: Are You Taking on Too Much of Others’ Pain?

“All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.” ~Havelock Ellis

I would have done anything for my friends, until one of them nearly broke my heart and spirit. He was my best friend. We felt like platonic soul mates.

We had a standing lunch date every week, called each other terms of endearment, cried together, laughed together—the standard best friend things.… Read More

Man Sitting

Do You Define Yourself and Your Life Negatively?

Growing up on military bases I learned to make friends quickly. My family moved a half dozen times before I was out of the second grade, so I didn’t have many other options. But while living on base it was easy, because all us military brats were in the same boat.… Read More

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