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When You Don’t Like Being Nice: What to Do Instead

“Don’t trade your authenticity for approval.” ~Unknown

As a nice person, I am often conflicted because sometimes I don’t enjoy being nice. Sometimes I act nice out of moral obligation or because I’m trying to be consistent with my perceived identity.

Do you view yourself as “nice”? Do others describe you as “nice”? Do you always enjoy being “nice”? If you are unsure how you are perceived by others, ask friends and family to describe you.

I’ve been told how nice I am all my life, by family, friends, coworkers, and even bosses. It was a huge part of my …

How to Appreciate Your Body (During COVID-19 and Always)

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Imagine if we obsessed about the things we loved about ourselves.” ~Unknown

I used to have a plaque with this quote prominently displayed in my waiting room. Sadly, it’s somehow gotten misplaced over the years.

What I remember most about the plaque was how it engaged, or disengaged, the people who noticed it. Did they mention the quote when they came into my office? Pointedly ignore it? Let me know that self-love is what they want for themselves? Or express skepticism …

The Most Important Lessons We Can Take from This Pandemic

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“And the people stayed home. And read books, and listened, and rested, and exercised, and made art, and played games, and learned new ways of being, and were still. And listened more deeply. Some meditated, some prayed, some danced. Some met their shadows. And the people began to think differently.” ~Kitty O’Meara

While this pandemic is turning out to be a very confusing and difficult time for many people, it is undoubtedly giving humanity an incredibly rare opportunity to learn some …

Why I Want to Stop Judging and How This Opens My Heart

“The quicker you are in attaching verbal or mental labels to things, people, or situations, the more shallow and lifeless your reality becomes, and the more deadened you become to reality.” ~Eckhart Tolle

Things are hard right now, aren’t they? When I first started writing this article about my goal to drop labels so I could live without judgment, I was thinking I didn’t want to judge people at the gym based on what their T-shirts said.

Now I’m trying not to judge people in my local community and around the country for taking actions that make me feel …

The Challenge of Doing Less When You’re Used to Doing More

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“I became an overachiever to get approval from the world.” ~Madonna

I have spent my entire life looking for more. More to do, more to achieve, and more to see.

I have always been a planner—meticulously planning everything from vacations to visits with friends to my life months (or years) ahead.

I plan because I’ve always wanted to fit in as much as possible in the finite time I was allotted. I never wanted to feel like time was wasted or …

My Cat Had Cancer and Taught Me How to Cope with Illness

“A cat purring on your lap is more healing than any drug in the world, as the vibrations you are receiving are of pure love and contentment.” ~St. Francis of Assisi

We all know what it is like to be sick. At some point in our lives we get the flu or a bad cold, but we know the course—get lots of rest and before you know it you are as good as new. But for some of us, we live with chronic illness.

Chronic illness brings with it day-to-day symptoms, the ones you cannot get away from. Coping with

Lost Your Job? Here Are 4 Things That Might Help

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Life isn’t always fair. Some people are born into better environments. Some people have better genetics. Some are in the right place at the right time. If you’re trying to change your life, all of this is irrelevant. All that matters is that you accept where you are, figure out where you want to be, and then do what you can, today and every day, to hold your head high and keep moving forward.” ~Lori Deschene

Like millions of people these …

5 Affirmations for Resilience in the Face of Uncertainty

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Embrace uncertainty. Some of the most beautiful chapters in our lives won’t have a title until much later.” ~Bob Goff

Let me tell you something important. It’s a rule of life, a law of nature if you will. This law is not only a psychological truth, but it’s also biological, chemical, cultural, maybe even metaphysical.

What I’m about to say is not comfortable, but it’s necessary. People who truly understand this principle are resilient and adaptive. Those of us who choose …

How to Come Out Stronger After Heartbreak

“And when I thought ‘I can’t go on,’ the universe expanded, mother earth hummed and the moon whispered, ‘Yes, you can’.” ~Wicked Words

Heartbreak. The feeling that so many of us would pay big (BIG) money to skip through. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard (and heard myself say), “I just want to skip this part and fast forward to when I feel better.”

I fell in love unexpectedly, but when is it ever expected? I had just gotten through an awful breakup and this perfect man for me fell from the heavens. He made me feel …

Book Giveaway, HumanKind: You’ll Laugh, You’ll Cry (Really!)

UPDATE: Brad has generously decided to give away seven books instead of five. If your name is listed below, please contact me at email(AT)tinybuddha(DOT)com with your address so I can share it with him! The winners are:

As I write this, I’m having one of those days. I feel so agitated it’s like there’s a tornado under my skin, yet so drained it took me five minutes to get my fingers to start typing words.

I’m guessing I’m not alone in feeling a lot of intense emotions …

Why Journaling is the Best Thing to Do During a Crisis

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“The difference between despair and hope is just a different way of telling stories from the same set of facts.” ~Alain de Botton

When I was told that the man I loved had a terminal illness, I instinctively reached for my journal. When I was asked to evacuate my home ahead of a category-5 cyclone three short weeks after his funeral, the first thing I threw into the back of my car was a large box with my journals.

That was …

How to Appreciate Life (Even During a Global Pandemic)

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Life is what happens when you’re busy making plans.” ~John Lennon

When I was in my late twenties I went on a trip with my mom and brother to Scotland.

Though I was a bit trepidatious about spending so much time with my family, I was excited for the trip too. When it finally arrived, I couldn’t wait to see the gorgeous Highlands, tour ancient castles, and eat endless amounts of shortbread. When we got there, I did exactly that, and …

Surviving as an Empath During the Time of Coronavirus

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting and less scary.” ~Fred Rogers

If you are a human on earth at the moment, you’re likely feeling the uncertainty and anxiety of living in the time of a pandemic. It’s not something we have seen before in our lifetime, so every step is a new one, and the end is unknown and nowhere in sight.

Everyone is coping in their own way. Some are fearful and anxious …

Why We Feel Lonely and What to Do About It

“At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.” ~Lau Tzu

With social distancing measures in place in response to the new coronavirus, many of us have a lot more time on our hands, while also being isolated.

This may also mean you’re feeling loneliness more intensely than you’ve experienced it before.

This is a good thing! Challenges can help us to understand ourselves on a much deeper level than we would have if we weren’t challenged—precisely because our feelings are more intense.

Loneliness is not new. …

Don’t Let Hope Keep You Stuck

“I hope that this whole COVID-19 thing goes away so we can resume our regular lives.”
“I hope this quarantine will be over soon!”
“I hope that things will go back to how they used to be.”

You may be thinking, wishing, or even hoping these things—and are just waiting for things to get better. That was definitely me the first few weeks of quarantine.

Recently I’ve been pondering the possibility that COVID-19 may actually never go away and we may have to learn to adapt and live with it. It may be like influenza—seasonal, with a recommended shot, and …

We’re All in This Together, and That’s a Beautiful Thing

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Lessons in life will be repeated until they are learned.” ~Frank Sonnenberg

Right now, I am living my life in lines.

This is not code for something philosophically abstract or profound. I am literally living my life in lines.  Lines with approximately six feet between me and the woman in colorful exercise clothes; the man in Carhart jeans, hoodie, and baseball cap; and the young mother with her rosy-cheeked toddler bobbing up and down in a seat in the cart, singing …

When Someone I Respected Violated My Trust…

This above all: to thine own self be true.” ~William Shakespeare

Though I appeared pretty high-functioning and what you might call “normal” as a kid, I was a ball of self-doubt and insecurity from an early age.

Overthinking, scrutinizing my actions, and generally worrying about what people thought came as naturally to me as breathing. Life felt like a great balancing act between who I thought I should be and who I actually was—and it was pretty exhausting.

You can imagine my relief when, while browsing for a textbook in the library at eighteen, I discovered the self-help …

5 Positive Lessons from the Coronavirus Crisis

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“What is to give light must endure the burning.” ~Viktor Frankl

The world is facing challenging times of crisis. Closed borders and travel bans, quarantine, shortage of food supply, scary news, and much fear. Viruses don’t care about our status, money, or fame, spreading from state officials to famous actors.

Being a human right now is not easy. My thoughts are with those who lost a family member or a friend. I can’t imagine the pain of those battling mental or …

HumanKind: A Book That Will Inspire You and Help Change the World

I have always believed that kindness is the truest measure of beauty. And I need only think of my grandmother to confirm that this is true. Giving, nurturing, understanding—she was all these things till the day she died, undeniably radiant, at the age of eighty-four. She smiled with her eyes and loved out loud, and that’s who I want to be.

If you’re fortunate, you’re close to someone like this, a person who exudes warmth and meets you with gentleness and compassion, even when you’re not at your best.

If you’re observant, you’ll see people from all walks of life …

Disconnected and Strong in the Face of COVID-19

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Distance sometimes lets you know who is worth keeping, and who is worth letting go.”
~
Lana Del Rey

As COVID-19 started to change my life I found myself thinking about my family. My parents who I haven’t really spoken to much since 2007, and my sister. I wondered how they were doing and what they must have been feeling at that moment.

Then I stopped myself and reminded myself why I had cut connections with them in the first place. …