I’m sorry to hear about what you’re going through. I’m going to ask you some questions that may help free you up mentally. (You don’t need to answer these for me. These are just to help you).

1. Are you aware of the fact that thinking about how she hurt you in the past does nothing but cause you pain in the present?

2. Does a part of you feel like you get something from thinking about the past over and over again? (Does it make you feel in control somehow? Do you feel like you’re protecting yourself from pain down the line?)

3. With that in mind, what do you think causes you to keep mentally rehashing the past?

4. Can you think of some ways to dispute those thoughts when they come up so you’re able to let them go and come back to the present moment? 

One thing you may want to try is visualizing a stop sign and either thinking or saying the word “Stop” every time you start dwelling. This, I find, is the best way to let go: one thought at a time. You might not do it perfectly every time, but you will begin to make progress if you work at it continually.

I also highly recommend meditation or yoga to create some clarity. That will help a great with acceptance, forgiveness, and letting go.

I hope this helps!

Lori

It is true, room to move on is important. 

I would say also that an entirely different setting might be very helpful. 
When I came back from a vacation/work trip, I realized that I had effortlessly not even thought about my story for the entire 10 days of my absence from home.  As soon as I got back, it hit me again though.  Afterwards, I sort of forced myself into the state of mind from my trip, meaning not thinking about it at all, as it was so much more pleasant!

In fact, I told my story so often (to the same person), I got tired of it myself!