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Category “change & challenges”

When Things Go Wrong: 5 Tips for Navigating Your “Why Me” Moments

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“Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” ~C.S. Lewis

Have you ever been cruising down the highway of life only to unexpectedly hit a major pothole that completely threw you off? Maybe you lost a job, ended a relationship, or were betrayed by a friend.

It’s easy to wonder “why did this happen to me?” and stay buried in the pothole. It’s up to us to break free and regain our cruising speed on our life journey. Easier said than done, right?…

More Information is Not the Answer; More Action Is

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“Knowing is not enough, we must apply. Willing is not enough, we must do.” ~Bruce Lee

We live in a world where information is literally at our fingertips, twenty-four hours a day, every day. As wonderful as this can be, it can also lead to a number of challenges.

With so much information available to us it can be difficult to know which way is up.

The more we read, the more confused we become.

One source makes a logical argument for one way to do something. Then we read a completely opposing view that is backed by another logical …

Why It’s Okay to Feel Lost (And How to Find Your Way Again)

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“Feeling lost, crazy and desperate belongs to a good life as much as optimism, certainty and reason.” ~Alain de Botton

Do you feel lost and alone?

Adrift and confused about which way to go?

Do you long for “something more” but have no clue what’s missing?

Maybe you’re not miserable exactly, but you’re not animated and in love with life either.

Your circumstances may even look pretty good on the outside.

But on the inside, where truth resides, you are bored to tears, unfulfilled, and restless.

Or maybe you are miserable, stuck in a painful place, silently suffering.

Trust me; …

Learn to Reduce Stress: Mindfulness eCourse by Thich Nhat Hanh

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Stress can be overwhelming, and sometimes crippling.

Not only does stress suck the joy out of our days and keep us awake at night, it can also take a toll on our bodies.

Headaches, chest pain, digestive problems, hair loss—they’re all potential consequences of stress, not to mention serious conditions like heart disease and diabetes.

Then, of course, there are mental consequences. We feel anxious, restless, and irritable, and often scared and discouraged. Like there’s too much to do and we don’t have enough time or skills to do it.

Everything feels urgent, like life is a series of catastrophes …

How to Deal with Depression and Anxiety: 10 Lessons from a Lake

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“Forces beyond your control can take away everything you possess except one thing, your freedom to choose how you will respond to the situation.” ~Viktor Frankl

Low moods can roll in like a numbing wave, washing out the pleasure from life.

If you’ve experienced this, you’re not alone. Surveys have shown that the vast majority of people in the US eventually experience some depressive symptoms, and many are anxious. I’ve been there before.

Early in my medical career, I made some research findings that contradicted the then-current views. My boss was not an expert in that area, so he simply …

How to Reconnect with the Inner Light Below Your Pain

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TRIGGER WARNING: This post deals with an account of physical abuse and may be triggering to some people.

“What hurts you blesses you, darkness is your candle.” ~Rumi

We are all born with it. The beautiful bright light in our soul, filled with love and happiness.

I remember having that feeling of being so alive and free and untouched by fear or worry.

This is who we are at the core of our being. This is our true authentic self, from before the world told us who we needed to be and negative outside circumstances started to tear down …

Follow Your Heart, Not Your Fear: How to Make Choices That Are Right for You

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“Unnecessary fear of a bad decision is a major stumbling block to good decisions.” ~Jim Camp

Twenty years ago, my wife and I decided to move from Montréal, where we had lived for the first thirty-five years of our lives, to Nova Scotia, 800 miles away, where we had no connections whatsoever. Neither a small decision nor undertaking, since this involved our four kids and the entire contents of our house (not to mention a dog and two cats).

Why were we moving? We were not moving because of a job opportunity; we enjoyed the life we had in Montréal. …

5 Common Regrets and How to Avoid Them

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“I don’t regret the things I’ve done, I regret the things I didn’t do when I had the chance.” ~Unknown

If you had a second chance at life, what would you resolve to do differently? What would you regret from your past if you had the power to change it in your future?

In 2011, Bronnie Ware wrote a wonderful book called Top 5 Regrets Of The Dying.

As a palliative care nurse, Bronnie spent several years working with patients during their final weeks of life. She documented the dying epiphanies of her patients and began to notice some …

6 Lessons from a Cancer Survivor to Help You Get Through Anything

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“Oh, my friend, it’s not what they take away from you that counts—it’s what you do with what you have left.” ~Hubert Humphrey

Last year I was diagnosed with breast cancer three weeks after my wedding, at twenty-seven years old. After months of grueling chemotherapy treatments, I am now recovering from surgery and can look back with tremendous appreciation at what my body has accomplished.

One question I get, after the gasps and looks of incredulity have faded, is how I got through it all.

Now, for a long time, my toughest challenges in life were those brought on by …

An Open Letter To My Bullies: Thank You For Making Me Strong

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“The heart is like a garden: it can grow compassion or fear, resentment or love. What seeds will you plant there?” ~Jack Kornfield

Dear Bullies,

To be honest, I didn’t think I would ever write you a letter. As far as I was concerned, the amount of suffering I went through during my school years was enough to make me bitter.

I didn’t forgive you, and I most certainly wasn’t about to forget.

I remember those years like it was yesterday—the cruel name calling; the scrutinizing of how I looked, what I said, and what I did; the public …

10 Ways to Lift Your Spirits When You’re Having a Tough Week

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“True happiness is born of letting go of what is unnecessary.” ~Sharon Salzberg

You are exhausted. Every force in the universe seems to be conspiring against you.

You pick yourself up just to be knocked down again by more bad news.

It’s not fair!

You want to crawl in bed and wait for the week to be over.

But you know you can’t hide.

Sometimes our lives get tough. It happens to all of us. You know things will eventually get better, but it’s hard to get through a ruthless week in one piece.

When you are having a …

10 Things to Remember When You Feel Lost and Alone

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“Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.” ~Sonia Ricotti

I would lie awake at night aching for rest and relief from my racing mind. Hot milk with honey, yoga postures with my feet above my head, no chocolate after three in the afternoon—I had tried it all.

I was weaning myself off sleeping pills. Wrenching myself from my love affair with the tiny white disc. I’d pop it under my tongue to slide from the shackles of adrenaline. They felt impossible to escape.

I’d started using sleeping pills in my last semester …

How to Make a Hard Change and Avoid Future Regrets

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“If you do tomorrow what you did today, you will get tomorrow what you got today.” ~Benjamin Franklin

If you want change, it has to come from inside. You can’t rely on someone or something to change you; you have to do it yourself.

However, it’s one thing to want it, but it’s another to actually do it. That’s the hard part—doing it. Change can be hard.

But there’s a technique to get yourself to take action to make a change. It’s simple, and truly powerful.

A Technique to Get Yourself to Make a Change

It’s just a matter …

How to Change Your Life When It Feels Like Nothing is Going Your Way

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“The rose is a rose from the time it is a seed to the time it dies. Within it, at all times, it contains its whole potential. It seems to be constantly in the process of change; yet at each state, at each moment, it is perfectly all right as it is.” ~Timothy Gallwey

Have you ever wanted something so desperately that you became devastated after many failed attempts to get it?

Has the same pattern kept repeating itself no matter how you tried to change it?

Have you ever longed for something so deeply that you lost interest in …

Finding Freedom in Illness: A Guide to Suffering Less When Sick (Interview & Giveaway)

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UPDATE: The winners for this giveaway include:

  • Naomi
  • KC
  • Lisa Pellegrino
  • Caroline Létourneau
  • Viktor Dmitriv
  • Kristin Kollinger
  • Heather S
  • Erica Lombard
  • Christine
  • Bridget Howe

If you’ve ever been sick for a prolonged period of time, you understand how physically, mentally, and emotionally draining it can be.

Maybe you don’t know what’s causing your illness, or how to treat it, and you’re tired of searching for answers.

Maybe you blame yourself for repressing emotions, not exercising, or otherwise potentially causing your condition; or maybe you don’t hold yourself responsible, but fear that others do.

Maybe you can no longer do the …

Overcoming Shame: Forgive Yourself and Let Go

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“Stop beating yourself up. You are a work in progress; which means you get there a little at a time, not all at once.” ~Unknown

I haven’t always been the woman I am today.

I used to be scared. Of everything. And everyone. Painfully shy and insecure, I saw myself as a victim of my circumstances and was always waiting, on guard, for the next rejection. I masked my insecurity in a blanket of perfectionism, and worked hard to put forth the image that I had everything together and had it all figured out.

I did a good job …

Overcoming Disappointment in Work, Love, and Life (Book Giveaway)

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Update – The winners for this giveaway are:

  • simpleshoes
  • twylapopcorn

When life doesn’t meet our expectations, it can devastate our sense of security, threaten our self-esteem, and leave us feeling lost, scared, and out of control. I know—I’ve been there quite a few times before.

Like the time I moved across the country to live with a man I’d met online just a month prior, only to recognize nine months later that we were two broken people who were toxic together.

Or the time I got involved with a multi-level marketing company, thinking I’d be a huge success, only to …

Gifts from a Terrible Disease: A Message for Anyone Who’s Slowly Losing a Loved One

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“Challenges are gifts that force us to search for a new center of gravity. Don’t fight them. Just find a new way to stand.” ~Oprah Winfrey

Alzheimer’s crept into our lives about five years ago. It’s like a vine growing alongside a house, slowly taking over the space that was once free. But in this case, the vine is slowly creeping over my mum’s brain.

There are so many horrific statistics attached to this disease: Worldwide, nearly forty-four million people currently have Alzheimer’s or a related dementia; one in nine Americans over sixty-five has Alzheimer’s disease; unless a cure is …

How to Deal When You’re Overwhelmed: 5 Ways to Turn Stress into Joy

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“When we meet real tragedy in life, we can react in two ways—either by losing hope and falling into self-destructive habits, or by using the challenge to find our inner strength.” ~Dalai Lama

You’re overwhelmed and stressed by all the things that need to be done. All your best-laid plans for becoming a better version of yourself are feeling very tenuous at the moment.

You still want to be healthier, more present in your relationships, and able to appreciate and express gratitude for all the things you have instead of worrying about the things you don’t. But, you are strongly …

4 Things You Need to Hear When You’re Emotionally Exhausted

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“Slow down and everything you are chasing will come around and catch you.” ~John De Paola

You’re on the verge of burnout.

You’re unmotivated to perform even the simplest of tasks. You’re physically and emotionally isolated. Slight annoyances cause you to snap.

You may be blaming your work, other people, or circumstances. But if you dig a little deeper, you may be surprised to learn that your own choices have led to emotional exhaustion. This is good news because it means that you can alleviate your own pain without the permission or blessing of another person.

In my junior …