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Category “love & relationships”

Friends

5 Ways You Attract Great People When You Like Yourself More

“By accepting yourself and being fully what you are, your presence can make others happy.” ~Jane Roberts

Several years ago, I was so unhappy with my harsh loneliness that I decided that I was going to try anything under the sun to build a social life and have friends that cared about me.… Read More

Let Go

The Greatest Act of Love Is Letting Go

“Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.” ~Sonia Ricotti

I was brought up in a family and culture that was riddled with fear.

My elders were terrified of the world and always on the defensive for something bad to happen. They believed that love meant closely protecting others from the dangers of the world and the pain of life.… Read More

Inner Light

Developing Self-Compassion: 5 Tips to Stop Being Down on Yourself

“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.” ~Jack Kornfield

I never wanted to see a therapist. I imagined settling onto the storied couch and seeing dollar signs appear in concerned eyes as I listed the family history of mental illness, addiction, and abuse. I feared I’d be labeled before I’d ever been heard.… Read More

Showing the Way

Encouraging Love: Help Your Partner Grow Without Being a Critic

“You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.” ~Thich Nhat Hahn

When you think you’re an evolved and conscious woman and your partner tells you in no unclear terms that you’re “hard to be with,” it does a number on you.

Those words landed like a well-aimed boulder, smashing the immaculate vision I’d created of evolving myself: an exemplary girlfriend who was “doing the work” to grow, to become generously loving, spiritually awake, and to wholeheartedly support and encourage her beautiful partner to open to his fullest potential.… Read More

Kissing

Finding a Good Match: Know What You Want and Need in a Relationship

“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” ~Brené Brown

I recently left a relationship that I was not happy in. Although my ex was definitely an unconditional lover, it painfully bothered me that the man I loved was not taking care of his responsibilities.… Read More

Heart

A Lasting Romance Is Built on Flaws: 6 Tips for a Strong Relationship

“Let our scars fall in love.” ~Galway Kinnell

We all bring our own baggage to any relationship. I know that my past relationships have shaped my approach to love and romance. When we seek out that special someone to share our life, the disappointments of our past relationships tends to get in the way of new discoveries.… Read More

sad face

Developing Self-Compassion When You Don’t Think You’re Enough

“He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.” ~Lao Tzu

I’m at war with enoughness.

My stomach isn’t flat enough; I’m not extroverted enough; I don’t have enough money in my wallet; I’m not creative enough; I’m not getting enough work done.

There are times when the Jaws of Life cannot free me from my expectations and negative self-talk.Read More

Lonely Girl

The Greatest Lesson We Learn When Someone Is Unkind

“I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind.” ~Khalil Gibran

I recently travelled to Malaysia for a friend’s wedding where I spent four delicious days communing with wild monkeys and feasting on sticky rice. The people were kind and warm, the culture rich, the trip magical.… Read More

Sitting Together

How to Help Others Without Compromising Yourself

“The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.” ~Benjamin Disraeli

When I entered into a relationship with my ex-boyfriend four years ago, I felt I had found a kindred spirit. We met at a meditation retreat where we both volunteered in the kitchen.… Read More

friends

Letting Go of Stubbornness: Appreciate Your Loved Ones While You Can

“Before someone’s tomorrow has been taken away, cherish those you love, appreciate them today. “ ~Michelle C. Ustaszeski

My brother Greg and I were the closest of friends growing up, even if you weigh in the occasional tiff or disagreement we sometimes had.

We discovered our favorite toys together as kids, rode bikes side by side, and conquered video games as a two-man team.… Read More

Friends

7 Ways to Form Deep, Meaningful Friendships

“To have a friend and be a friend is what makes life worthwhile.” ~Unknown

I am fascinated by friendships.

Not the acquaintances you see occasionally or the Facebook friends who wouldn’t recognize you on the street.

I’m talking about your real people. The people who know and love the deepest parts of you.… Read More

Walk Away

Finding the Courage to Let Go of the Familiar and Make a Change

“Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.” ~Raymond Lindquist

I’ve been processing my beliefs on courage since I turned 31.

When I was in my 20s and teens, my idea of courage was that you fight until the death, never give up, be the one to say the last word, and always, always prove your point.… Read More

Moment to Myself

Learning to Say No: 4 Questions for the Busy and Overwhelmed

“It is not enough to be busy; so are the ants. The question is: what are we busy about?” ~Henry David Thoreau

A couple of years ago my friends and I went on a weekend retreat to honor our dear friend’s 40th birthday. It was supposed to be a relaxing weekend filled with yoga and meditation at an ashram in the mountains.… Read More

Envious

When Your Friend’s Happy News Fills You with Envy Instead of Joy

“It is in the character of very few men to honor without envy a friend who has prospered.” ~Aeschylus

It’s crazy, isn’t it?

Your best friend enthusiastically shares some big news. You say all the right things and display the right emotions. But inside you’re burning up. Instead for feeling truly happy, you’re filled with uncontrollable envy.… Read More

You Are Enough

You are Enough: A Tiny Manual for Being Your True Self

“Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be.” ~Alan Watts

When I was in third grade, I loved to hang upside down on the monkey bars on the playground of my all-girls school in Philadelphia.

I would lock my little pale knees over the gray steel rods and then carefully let my hands go to swing upside down, like a pendulum in a pleated skirt.… Read More

See Yourself

Why We Lie to Ourselves and How It Creates Tension

“That I feed the hungry, forgive an insult, and love my enemy…. these are great virtues.
But what if I should discover that the poorest of the beggars and the most impudent of offenders are all within me, and that I stand in need of the alms of my own kindness; that I myself am the enemy who must be loved?
Read More

Im Free

Free Yourself from Regret and Transform Your Life

“The practice of forgiveness is our most important contribution to the healing of the world.” ~Marianne Williamson

I always had a hard time accepting all of me. As early as I can remember others defined me by saying “You are so weird.” Not in a malicious way but more in a “you don’t fit into our familiar box” sort of way.… Read More

Couple Sitting

3 Ways to Know When a Relationship Isn’t Right for You

“New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings.” ~Lao Tzu

I was going out with a wonderful man. He was generous and caring and had a great sense of humor. He treated me well and attended to my every need.

But something just wasn’t right. I battled with myself for over a month.… Read More

sadness

7 Ways to Cope With the Grief of Heartbreak

“Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” ~C.S. Lewis

Shock. That was the first feeling. Shock and disbelief.

This isn’t really happening. Denial.

Look into her eyes. Slow realization. I’m not dreaming. Fear.

Wave upon wave of torrential sadness.… Read More

Tiny Buddha's Guide Cover

Win a Free Copy of Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself

UPDATE: The winners for this giveaway have already been chosen. 

The winners:

  • Antwanette Miller
  • Rebecca

This may seem like Déjà vu, because I published an almost identical post last Friday. It’s now a new week (soon to be weekend) and a new chance to win a copy of Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself!Read More

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