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Category “mindfulness & peace”

Dealing with Painful Memories to Find Peace in the Present

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“The practice of forgiveness is our most important contribution to the healing of the world.” ~Marianne Williamson

I awoke early one morning, the cries and pleas of my dreams slowly dissipating, and though I could no longer hear or see what was happening, it stayed with me as I drifted back to the real world. I knew this story; I had dreamed a memory, and the remains of it stayed with me in my body.

Like a dark cloud it made me pull my knees into my chest, and it forced salty tears from my closed eyes.  I had dreamed …

10 Ways to Turn Around a Bad Day in 10 Minutes Or Less

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“Peace begins with a smile.” ~Mother Theresa

Minor things can trigger bad days, whether it’s a having a tiff with your roommate, getting stuck in traffic, or just waking up on the wrong side of the bed.

As a fitness instructor, I’ve found that one negative comment from a member in a class can completely derail an otherwise happy day.

Someone in one of my fitness classes once griped about my music selection after what I thought was an amazing class. It almost drained my entire high, but after hearing from the other 99.9% of the class that was sweaty …

Overextending and Overachieving: Create Space in a Busy Schedule

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“Beware the barrenness of a busy life.” ~Socrates

The spring of 2010 was all about the 3 H’s: hotels, hospitals, and hospice. I was in the midst of a busy quarter for my consulting business (the hotel part), and my mother had been diagnosed with lung cancer (the hospital and hospice part).

I’ll be honest—my relationship with my mother had been tenuous since my late teens. No matter how challenging a relationship has been, however, watching the slow and painful death of a parent is heartbreaking.

Want to know how I dealt with the loss and grief? I ran away …

Interview & Book Giveaway: Misadventures of a Garden State Yogi

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Note: The winners for this giveaway have already been chosen. Subscribe to Tiny Buddha for free daily or weekly emails and to learn about future giveaways!

The Winners:

Yoga, road trips, and personal stories that border on TMI—these are all things I enjoy, which might explain why I was drawn to Misadventures of a Garden State Yogi.

In this engaging self-help memoir, author and yoga teacher Brian Leaf shares his experiences healing Colitis and ADD through yoga.

Including anecdotes from a cross-country journey during which he tried many different studios, Brian provides a window into his …

Transform Your Life by Loving Yourself in Action

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“Your actions are your only true belongings.” ~Allan Lokos

I used to be the kind of girl who relished stable and perfect surroundings. I fanned my magazines. I scrubbed the inside of the refrigerator.

I worked tirelessly to cultivate the external environment that I was lacking inside.

Externally, things were in order. The bills were paid. The laundry was folded.

Internally, I was a voracious black hole of yearning.

I consumed everything that was closest to me—food, love, validation—in an attempt to fill the void that I experienced on a daily basis. That feeling of not being enough, of …

7 Powerful Realizations That Will Help You Suffer Less

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“More important than the quest for certainty is the quest for clarity.” ~Francois Gautier

Pain was my norm; not physical pain, but emotional pain compounded with mental self-torture. I was an introvert without introspection, painfully shy and unable to make eye contact. I caved to all manners of peer pressure.

I was a doormat and didn’t stand up for myself, although I would fight tooth and nail for someone else. It seemed like others often took advantage of my kindness. I took everything personally and cried a lot. Thoughts of suicide lasted for years.

After more than a decade of …

When You’re Pretending to Be Fine: 9 Tips to Deal and Heal

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“Our strength grows out of our weaknesses.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

I never thought I’d want to kill myself.

All my life, I’d been a strong, independent woman, building a business from home, raising two wonderful sons, and staying happy and positive throughout.

If you’d told me I’d one day consider taking my own life, I’d have laughed and said, “You’ve got me confused with someone else!”

But after twenty years and two sons together, my husband and I decided to split up.

So what? Separation and divorce are commonplace. You just cope with it like everyone else. I was strong, …

Love Your Body, Love Yourself: You Are Not Alone

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“Judge nothing, you will be happy. Forgive everything, you will be happier. Love everything, you will be happiest.” ~Sri Chinmoy

I hated myself when I was a kid.

I was overweight and starting to really like girls, but they didn’t like me.

I didn’t want to take my shirt off in front of them, so I didn’t go to the pool. And, when my parents made one last ditch effort at their marriage and moved to Coral Springs, Florida when I was in fifth grade—away from my friends and my hometown of Davenport, Iowa—I didn’t go to the beach.

Any …

We Are More Than What We Do: Allowing Our Authentic Nature to Shine

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“The light at the end of the tunnel is not an illusion. The tunnel is.” ~Unknown

In this society of ours, parents teach their children to do, to perform, to produce. We learn that to be adult, we need to be “productive members of society.” At social gatherings, more often than not, the first question among strangers is “What do you do?”

My first memories include identifying so deeply with my movie director father that when asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I always replied, “A writer and director.”

Then life happened, and I spent decades …

3 Reasons to Stop Trying So Hard to Be Positive and Peaceful

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“Freedom is instantaneous the moment we accept things as they are.” ~Karen Maezen Miller

The world is filled with people who work hard at being positive, peaceful, and more spiritual and then feel bad when they don’t measure up. I know because I used to be one of them. And I still am from time to time.

That was before I realized something:

1 It doesn’t work.

2. Spirituality isn’t something you do; it’s something you are, and you are this right now. Just as beneath the chatter of your mind you are already positive and peaceful too.

3. You …

Writing a Letter to Your Future Self: Love Who You’ll Become

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“Tension is who you think you should be.  Relaxation is who you are.” ~Chinese Proverb

Yes, I had reached the age of twenty-five. Still, I doubted this letter from my past would make it to me, all these years later. It was a simple creative writing assignment from when I was fifteen.

The teacher collected our letters to our future ourselves in self-addressed envelopes with stamps and promised to mail them ten years later. But, so much time had passed; would he keep his word? Would he even remember?

Thinking back on the letter, I tried to remember writing …

How to Find Peace When You Feel Scared About What Might Happen

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“Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security.” ~John Allen Paulos

I was in shock for about ten minutes after hearing the news, afraid while lying on the procedure table, and relieved when it was over.

Six months ago I had a mammogram. My checkup was supposed to be for a general mammogram—the one you get when you turn forty—but when I got there and told the technician that two days ago I had discovered a small bump in my right breast, the prescription was changed to a diagnostic …

Rituals for Renewal: 7 Steps to Lower Your Stress

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“Every day brings a choice: to practice stress or to practice peace.” ~Joan Borysenko

Every day I meet with people who are stressed and want things to be different. I also encounter people who are so distressed they’ve accepted suffering’s dominion over their life. Almost all, however, are interested in the concept of change.

Still, taking small, conscious steps toward a healthier emotional, mental, and physical life can sometimes seem overwhelming. More people have told me “I’m so busy—I can’t fit one more thing into my day!” than not. But what’s the alternative? It’s being just happy enough to be …

3 Ways to Transform Anxiety into Positive Energy

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“Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” ~Proverb

A few months ago, I moved from the metropolitan east coast to rural Indiana and bunked up with my grandparents to help them sell their house.

The house has finally sold, and now I am faced with options for where to go next. In other words, my future is completely uncertain at this point, and I’m experiencing quite a bit of anxiety over it.

On the real, I’m silently, and at times not so silently, freaking out.

Anxiety is so annoying in that it can be completely paralyzing. It is …

Being Honest: The Difference Between Privacy and Secrecy

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“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.” ~Ernest Hemingway

When I was a child I was part of a family that didn’t communicate beyond “pass the salt.”

There was no confiding of fears, sharing of hopes, and encouraging each other’s dreams. It was a superficial and empty existence but one that was completely normal to me.

Fast forward numerous years, add in three children and a loving partner of my own; now I try to create a childhood for my own kids that is a polar opposite to my own experience. …

Create Peace by Imagining a World Beyond It

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“We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.” ~Dalai Lama

What comes after peace? Have you ever stopped to think about this?

We spend so much of our time and energy working to attain both inner and global peace, but have we ever stopped to think about what this really means?

What is on the other side of peace?

Twice in my life, I have broken a board with my bare hand.

There is one simple rule to this technique. You must not focus on breaking the board but rather on breaking through …

A Creative Way to Judge Less and Appreciate Life More

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“Judgments prevent us from seeing the good that lies beyond appearances.” ~Wayne Dyer

I am one of the millions of people in the world obsessed with photography. My camera is almost always with me, and when it isn’t, my trusty iPhone works pretty well.

But photography for me is much more than a fun hobby, and it is much more than taking pretty pictures that I can sell.

Photography helps me notice and appreciate my life.

I practice what is called a meditative or contemplative form of photography. It’s about being present and open to life as it is, without …

The Top 10 Tiny Buddha Insights from 2012

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Happy almost 2013!

It seems like just yesterday I wrote “Happy almost 2012!” before summarizing the top lessons from 2011.

I’m not one for New Year’s resolutions, as I like to think that any moment is an ideal time to make a change, but I always appreciate looking back and recognizing progress and growth.

The site grew by leaps and bounds this year, surpassing two million monthly page views. However, what I’ve found most exciting is the increased interest in contributing to the blog.

Each month, I’ve received more submissions than the month before, but what inspires me …

New Year’s Tiny Wisdom Buy One Give One eBook Sale

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To celebrate the New Year, I decided to run a second Tiny Wisdom eBook sale (as I previously did on my birthday in August).

For today only, if you purchase the Tiny Wisdom eBook series (5 eBooks for $19.97), I will send a free set to a friend of your choice. (Weekly email subscribers, this offer is good for you today, Friday January 4th.)

All you need to do is:

  • Order your set (by scrolling all the way down and clicking on “buy now” for the full set)
  • Forward your confirmation email to me at email(AT)tinybuddha(DOT)com
  • Include your friend’s
…

Tiny Buddha Book Holiday Giveaway, Week 4

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Update: The winners for this giveaway have already been chosen. Subscribe to Tiny Buddha for free daily or weekly emails and to learn about future giveaways!

The Winners:

To celebrate the holiday season, I’ve decided to do a series of giveaways for my book, Tiny Buddha: Simple Wisdom for Life’s Hard Questions, which launched right around this time last year.

If you’ve already learned about the book or purchased it, this post will be redundant for you! For those who haven’t read it, here’s a little information about it:

This is the first book of …