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Alexander Kazoo

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  • #33792
    Alexander Kazoo
    Participant

    I always have this trouble…

    I have 20 years old and right now i’m in the third year of college.  Until this moment, I thought that I was doing well in my life. Always having really good grades, a group of friends, a family that always supported me, no economic or health problems…Hell, even a lot of people think I’m a cool and handsome guy.

    As today, nothing of that has changed. Only me. I have become more anxious and I’m always at the verge of tears. I cry for no reason at all. My head is always so full of thoughts that I cant enjoy the present moment without having those little annoying conversations in my head. Always telling me the worst, always speaking shit about me, always fearing. I have even become fearful of my friends. Friends that always loved me back and have never ever betrayed me. I  dont understand what is happening to me…

    I would love to see myself in the mirror and smiling once again.  But I can’t. It doesnt matter how many people have tried to tell me that everything is fine, that I’m not a bad person, etc.

    My life is perfect.But I cant enjoy it anymore. I don’t even like myself. But people love me anyway. I dont get it.

    I am my worst enemy. Always throwing junk at myself and robbing the  joy and laughter from life.

    #31926
    Alexander Kazoo
    Participant

    Sometimes I think there is something or someone waiting for us “on the other side”. But a lot of times I also remember what Carl Sagan used to say about that kind of “wishful thinking”, and then I remember that It really doesn’t matter. For the truly beauty and happiness is happening right here, right now, in this amazing planet we called Earth.

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