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Posts tagged with “acceptance”

Sad Man

The Path to Freedom: Facing Painful Thoughts and Feelings

“Life is an endless process of self-discovery.” ~James Gardner

My thoughts lately have been so hurtful.

Things like: I’m not a good writer. I’m ugly. I’m stupid.

I’m not funny. I can’t carry a meaningful conversation. I’ll never be special.

The world is out to get me. People take advantage of me.… Read More

Serenity Comes When...

Serenity Comes When…

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Disappointed Woman

How to Cope When People Disappoint You

“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.” ~Alexander Pope

Growing up, I had a wonderful relationship with my mother. We did all the usual mother-daughter things together—went shopping, had brunch—and we supported each other when my father left.

In 2011, I was happily pregnant. I felt supported by my family and ready to take on motherhood.… Read More

Peaceful Woman

Radically Accept What Is Instead of Labeling it “Good” or “Bad”

“The boundary to what we can accept is the boundary to our freedom.” ~Tara Brach

I was in the heart of my Ph.D. program when I received the diagnoses: OCD, depression, and binge eating disorder.

It explained a lot, of course. All those years of anxiety, self-doubt, and intrusive thoughts were not normal after all.… Read More

west highland terrier

Letting Go of Expectations: A Dog’s Wisdom on People and Life

Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach.” ~Tom Robbins

Have you ever finally gotten something you longed for only to find that things didn’t work out as expected?

I know I have.

I firmly believed that having a dog was the answer to some of my desires, such as having more meaning in my life and receiving love on demand from another life.… Read More

Slow Tortoise

Why Slow is the Way to Go: 6 Reasons to Take Your Time

“Stop beating yourself up. You are a work in progress; which means you get there a little at a time, not all at once.” ~Unknown

I’ve been practicing yoga, on and off, for fifteen years.

It’s helped me through and out the other side of infertility, kept me company on the long and winding road of adoption, and helped walk me out of the shadows of depression.… Read More

Depressed Woman

Transforming Self-Criticism: Stop Trying to Fix Yourself

“I define depression as a comparison of your current reality to a fantasy about how you wish your life would be.” ~Dr. John Demartini

I always wanted to do things “right.” I was the little kid at the front of the room, raising her hand for every question. I was great at pushing myself to succeed and please.… Read More

Woman in Tree Pose

Living Right Now: You Are Not Your Thoughts and Feelings

“Give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. ” ~Reinhold Niebuhr

Think about the future! Don’t do something you’ll regret! You need to plan for tomorrow! I wish I hadn’t done that! Will things ever work out?… Read More

Free Man

Releasing Expectations: It’s Okay to Be Right Where You Are

“The most important point is to accept yourself and stand on your two feet.” ~Shunryu Suzuki

When I was younger, I am sure I was a little bit arrogant. I had high expectations about life. They haven’t come to pass. I haven’t achieved whatever I thought I would achieve. It turns out that I’m an ordinary human being struggling with ordinary things.… Read More

Hiding Behind Hood

Do You Think You Need to Be Perfect to Be Accepted?

“What you resist, persists.” ~C.G. Jung

There it is: Perfection, Eureka!—the holy grail of achievement, like an elusive mirage in the middle of a desert or that pesky little pot of gold we are always hunting for at the end of the rainbow, purring with all of its possibilities, protection, and promise.… Read More

Give Yourself a Break

When You’re Hurting and Healing: Give Yourself a Break

“Stop beating yourself up. You are a work in progress; which means you get there a little at a time, not all at once.” ~Unknown

Often these days, I would like nothing more than to move forward. If I could only figure out which way was forward, I would definitely start heading in that direction.… Read More

Man at sunset

Why You Don’t Need to Eliminate Self-Doubt and Fear

“The more you hide your feelings, the more they show. The more you deny your feelings, the more they grow.” ~Unknown

Self-doubt has been a companion that has followed me around like a trained dog follows his master. Every step I’ve made outside of my comfort zone, it’s been there, right beside me.… Read More

Different

3 Surefire Ways to Embrace Being Different

“To be nobody but yourself in a world doing its best to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle any human can ever fight and never stop fighting.” ~e.e. cummings

I’m gay. I’m married to a woman and we have a beautiful daughter together. I also have an ex–boyfriend that I was with for quite a significant time.… Read More

At Peace

A Mindful Way to Find Relief from the Pain of Envy

“The more you hide your feelings, the more they show. The more you deny your feelings, the more they grow.” ~Unknown

Envy is such an overpowering and overwhelming feeling, often something hidden, or masked by a smiley face, or fuelled into rage and resentment. I’ve experienced all of these emotions in my life, and as I neared my fortieth birthday, I felt that I could not go on.… Read More

Woman with arms open

From Loathing to Love: What Makes Us Feel Worthwhile

“Never be ashamed of a scar. It simply means you were stronger than whatever tried to hurt you.” ~Unknown 

My healing journey can be described through what I call the “self formula”:

Self-Doubt > Self-Loathing > Self-Destruction > Self-Awareness > Self-Love

Mine is the oldest story in the book. Adolescent angst.… Read More

Breaking Up

When We Try to Change Others and Avoid Ourselves

“I’ve discovered that you can’t change people. They can change themselves.”~Jim Rohn

This is indeed a fact—a fact that took me a very long time to learn.

You may argue that we help each other change, and it’s true. But the deepest truth is that only we are responsible for our own growth.… Read More

Man Looking Out Window

Finding a Window of Opportunity When Life Closes a Door

“Things work out best for those who make the best of how things work out.” ~John Wooden

“Why don’t you just take up swimming?” the doctor asked.

I was twenty years old, single-minded in my pursuit of a dance career, visiting yet another doctor about the vicious tendinitis that had forced me to give up my spot at the prestigious Juilliard School in New York City.… Read More

Friends Having Fun

Why Life Is A Lot More Fun When We Stop Trying to Be Perfect

“The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.” ~Anna Quindlen

“Oh, my god,” she said, “I forgot to shave my left leg!”

That may not sound like a particularly dramatic announcement, but Jenny and I were sharing a seat on the chartered bus taking our senior class to the beach for “Senior Cut Day” a few weeks before graduation, and her discovery horrified me.… Read More

Acceptance

Accepting Things for What They Are Instead of Resisting Change

“What we see is mainly what we look for.” ~Unknown

Years ago I was fortunate enough to travel on a Mediterranean cruise. I had just graduated from college and was in that difficult transition stage where I didn’t know what would come next. I was looking to relax, but also hoping that some soul searching would lead to clarity, epiphanies, and answers.… Read More

Happy Woman with Dandelions

The Key to Happiness: Accept Yourself & Stop Seeking Approval

“Acceptance is not submission; it is acknowledgment of the facts of a situation, then deciding what you’re going to do about it.” ~Kathleen Casey Thiesen

I think many of us get caught in a vicious cycle of thinking that would lead us to believe the only way we can be happy is to gain acceptance from others.… Read More

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