“Love is the absence of judgment.” ~Dalai Lama
If judgment is the act of labeling something as good or bad, then it seems we humans do it thousands of times a day. Those of us on a spiritual path even label judgment as a bad thing. We know that pain comes from judgment, but it’s such a part of our culture that there seems to be no way around it.… Read More
“You get peace of mind not by thinking about it or imagining it, but by quietening and relaxing the restless mind.” ~Remez Sasson
What’s the first thought that goes through your head when you wake up in the morning? Is it deliberate or is it the default “Oh shi#$, it’s six!”?… Read More
“Don’t wait for people to be friendly. Show them how.” ~Unknown
When I was a teenager, right around the time I knew everything, my mother used to tell me I only remembered the bad things.
When I told stories about my family, they didn’t revolve around family beach trips, barbecues, and vacations; they focused on painful memories and all the ways I felt my mother had “ruined my life.”
The same applied to friends and milestones in my life.… Read More
“Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart.” ~Mencius
Remember when life was simple?
When your friends were the most important thing in the world. When a snow day was a perfect excuse to have fun, not a block of time when you felt guilty about being unproductive.… Read More
“I don’t believe people are looking for the meaning of life as much as they are looking for the experience of being alive.” ~Joseph Campbell
Because I am self-employed, I often find that my work is my life. There is no off switch when the day is over. Some days I get so caught up in the busyness that I completely forget myself.… Read More
“What you do today is important, because you are exchanging a day of your life for it.” ~Unknown
A few years ago I was on the busy track. I was working a corporate nine-to-five job, studying at night, and trying to keep up a busy social life. I thought I was achieving it all by doing so many things at once, but really, I was just burning myself out.… Read More
“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.” ~H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
In my late thirties, I attended a workshop that was led by a group of coaches. One of the exercises we did was called the “future self-exercise,” a visualization that took me twenty years into my future.… Read More
“Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it.” ~Unknown
When my last relationship ended, I found myself suddenly questioning what my goals honestly meant to me. I had focused my past five years steadily chasing a very specific dream with this woman (creating joy, art, and a community in NYC, adopting some dogs, and eventually moving back to California to start a family together).… Read More
“All appears to change when we change.” ~Henri-Frédéric Amiel
We often start from the outside to try to make change on the inside. Scratch that. We pretty much always start from the outside, thinking it will make changes on the inside.
I am the retired queen of looking externally for internal satisfaction.… Read More
“Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.” ~Dalai Lama
I used to think I was falling behind. Not on my rent or my taxes, but in life.
One moment, things were progressing fine. I had friends. Good teeth. A boyfriend. I even had my own did-I-really-do-all-that-study-to-be-doing-this first job.… Read More
“Life’s challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they’re supposed to help you discover who you are.” ~Bernice Johnson Reagon
My brother died suddenly, at just 39 years old. One moment he was in the midst of a regular working day. Half an hour later he was gone. Twenty-four hours later he was buried.… Read More
“One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it’s worth watching.” ~Unknown.
Death is something many of us fear. Perhaps not so much our own death, but the mere thought of losing a loved one can be heartbreaking.
On Sunday May 5th, my grandma had a large stroke.… Read More
“Happiness quite unshared can scarcely be called happiness.” ~Charlotte Brontë
Habits are a double-edged human habitual practice—they can be healthy and unhealthy, and can bring us happiness and unhappiness.
We’ve all read about the importance of healthy and successful habits, and how to choose and practice them. But I’ve also recently read about how healthy and successful habits alone don’t necessarily lead to good health or real success.… Read More
“The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.” ~Carl Rogers
I had just gotten settled into my hospital bed after two hours of preparation. I had 32 electrodes taped to my bandage-wrapped skull, plugged into a machine that monitored my brainwaves, with just enough room to go from the bed to the bathroom.… Read More
“Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power.” ~Shirley MacLaine
I love her to death, but it’s draining to talk to her.
Every time I call this friend of mine, I know what I’m in for: a half-hour rant about everything that’s difficult, miserable, or unfair.
Sometimes she focuses on the people she feels have wronged her, and other times she explores the general hopelessness of life.… Read More
“All the flowers of all the tomorrows are in the seeds of today.” ~Proverb
For as long as I can remember, I’ve wanted to contribute to the world somehow. I’ve always dreamed of starting a charity organization. I bet that, just like me, you walk around with some sort of wish in your heart to change the world in some way, but you might not do anything about it.… Read More
“Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.” ~Unknown
Maybe someone hurt you physically or emotionally. Maybe you’ve survived something else traumatic—a natural disaster, a fire, an armed robbery. Or maybe you’ve just come out of a trying situation, and though you know you’ll eventually recover, you still feel pain that seems unbearable.… Read More
“The secret of joy is the mastery of pain” ~Anais Nin
I come from a family of runners. They run from pain, emotions, and uncomfortable feelings.
My mom was 17 when she moved to Texas to get away from her overbearing mother. She couldn’t deal with the pain of never being enough for her parents or herself.… Read More
“Nothing reduces the odds against you like ignoring them.” ~Robert Brault
Do you ever wake up feeling like you’re battling yourself?
What’s worse is waking up in that battle and feeling like you’ve already lost before you’ve even started the day.
But think about that for a second: isn’t living this way crazy?… Read More