“A wise man makes his own decisions; an ignorant man follows public opinion.” –Chinese Proverb
As you may remember from a recent post, I’m planning to have surgery soon to remove benign uterine tumors, known as fibroids.
Although I felt certain then that this is the right thing to do, I’ve vacillated quite a bit—mostly because I’ve been listening to too many other people.… Read More
“It’s not enough to be busy; so are the ants. The question is: what are we busy about?” ~Henry David Thoreau
Last week my younger brother visited me for five days. To ensure I could spend as much time with as possible, I worked extra hard during the weekend before he arrived.… Read More
“The practice of forgiveness is our most important contribution to the healing of the world.” -Marianne Williamson
Did you ever feel like there was a conversation you really wanted to have with someone, and yet a part of you felt it was unwise?
This is a feeling I know all too well.… Read More
“Our way to practice is one step at a time, one breath at a time.” -Shunryu Suzuki
When I was younger I frequently had mini panic attacks and feared that I might suffocate. It literally felt difficult to catch my breath; it almost felt like I was being smothered.
When I felt this type of anxiety, people often told me, “Just breathe.” But that was the problem—it didn’t feel like I could.… Read More
“Judgments prevent us from seeing the good that lies beyond appearances.” -Wayne Dyer
The other day I was writing at a community table at Starbucks when an older man asked if he could sit next to me. Since our chairs were backed up against a wall, I had to get up to facilitate this.… Read More
“Nurture your mind with great thoughts; to believe in the heroic makes heroes.” -Benjamin Disraeli
The other day I read about an insightful Native American myth. A tribal elder tells his grandson that inside each of us, there is a black dog and a white dog doing battle.
The black dog possesses qualities typically understood as negative, including envy, greed, sorrow, anger, resentment, and arrogance.… Read More
“It’s not who you are that holds you back; it’s who you think you’re not.” -Unknown
I know this may seem obvious, but I recently realized I have the most confidence in the things that I do most frequently.
For example, I write every day—and I have a lot of confidence in my ability to help people through my words.… Read More
by Lori Deschene
“When you believe something can be done, really believe, your mind will find ways to do it.” -Dr. David Schwartz
In 1957, Dr. Robert Merton introduced an idea known as the Galatea Effect, which suggests we tend to do what we expect we’ll do.
If you think you can run a marathon, you’re more likely to push yourself through training and eventually cross the finish line.… Read More
“Be gentle first with yourself if you wish to be gentle with others.” -Lama Yeshe
All too often we’re unforgiving and cruel to ourselves in a way we’d never treat our friends.
We’d never look a friend in the eyes and tell her she’s not good enough. We’d never beat a friend up over one mistake he made years ago.… Read More
“Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand-and melting like a snowflake.” –Francis Bacon, Sr.
The other day I planned to work out in my apartment community’s fitness center after I finished writing.… Read More
“The possibilities are numerous once we decide to act and not react.” –George Bernard Shaw
As you may have noticed, I’m a huge movie buff. It’s largely because most films chronicle a hero’s journey, taking a character through all stages of transformation.
There’s recognition of the need to change, there’s fear, there’s resistance, there’s encouragement, there’s struggle, there’s redemption, and in the end, there’s rebirth, and a sense that things will keep getting better.… Read More
“What you do today is important, because you are exchanging a day of your life for it.” -Unknown
My boyfriend, who is an aspiring screenwriter, has told me that the film industry and moviegoers essentially want “the same, but different.”
We want the same themes, but with different people; the same humor, but in different circumstances.… Read More
“Don’t use a lot where a little will do.” -Proverb
I recently saw a reality show about reviving struggling restaurants. The premise is that an expert comes in to help save a family business—and in the process helps the owners rebuild their relationships and their lives.
In the beginning, the expert suggested the family reduce their menu from multiple pages to just one.… Read More
“Stress is caused by being ‘here’ but wanting to be ‘there.”‘ -Eckhart Tolle
There is little in life that is more stressful than thinking you need be somewhere else but feeling powerless to get there.
There’s this dream I used to have over and over again. I’d want to get somewhere, but my body wouldn’t move.… Read More
“Your task is not to seek love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” ~Rumi
After I wrote yesterday’s post about giving and receiving love, I started to think about the many times in the past when I felt love-deprived.
It’s easy to feel that way when we’ve been hurt or we think we’re alone—as if there aren’t any people who are really looking out for us.… Read More
“Eventually you will come to realize that love heals everything, and love is all there is.” -Gary Zukav
The end of last week was a little tough for me.
I was waiting to be scheduled for surgery, knowing it could fall anywhere within the next three months. I was realizing I will soon have thousands of dollars in medical and dental bills, between that, a recent mammogram to test another suspicious lump, and my eight cavity fillings.… Read More
“The whole life of a man is but a point in time; let us enjoy it.” -Plutarch
There are certain motivational quotes that I find to be a double-edged sword, in that they can both motivate us and lead to guilt and pressure, depending on how we interpret them.
One such quote reads, “Don’t say you don’t have enough time.… Read More
“Lean too much on other people’s approval and it becomes a bed of thorns.” -Tehyi Hsieh
“Oh no, I said something wrong.” If I had a top-10 list of defeatist thoughts that I’ve entertained most frequently over the course of my life, this would certainly make the cut.
I’ve thought this when I’ve met new people and wanted to make a good first impression.… Read More
“It is one of the most beautiful compensations of life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson
There was a time when I met every request with two instinctively defensive thoughts: “What are you trying to take from me?” And “What’s in it for me?”
Of course I didn’t say these things out loud.… Read More
“Good enough is the new perfect.” -Becky Beaupre Gillespie
Sometimes we hone in on everything we think we’re lacking or doing wrong, and wonder what we need to fix or change to measure up. Then we judge ourselves at each step of the way, questioning whether or not we’re doing everything we should.… Read More