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confused about current relationship with ex

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  • #125710
    roxin
    Participant

    Hi everyone,

    I need to vent and maybe some advice. My ex boyfriend and I hooked up about two weeks ago. We were broken up for two months at that moment and I had the worst two months of my life because he was my best friend for over four years and we shared so many good memories. But he wanted his freedom again because in the end we fought a lot about insignificant things. I still love him though.
    That day we hooked up we first talked, he started crying and told me he regretted breaking up with me. He told me we are such a good team. Ofcourse this was exactly what I wanted to hear so I fell for it. We talked that night about everything that had happened in the past two months we were broken up. He asked me if I had slept with other people and I answered honestly that I did. He did not sleep with other girls in that period. After that night we did not really talk about it again.
    Then two days later he had sex with another girl and I had to hear about it from someone else. He absolutely broke my heart because he says one thing and does another thing. After this happened he told me he hated himself for doing that to me.
    I did not know what to do, so I sent him an email and told him everything I was thinking, eventhough all my friends told me I should just let him go and leave but I couldn’t. I told him it doesn’t have to be over for me and I still love him.
    He sent me a text that he needed some time to answer this email. I am so confused with myself. I know he still cares about me because some of his friends told me so. But I feel like he does not want to be with me anymore. I will just have to wait for an answer to my email. But I just don’t know if I want to wait for this answer and just decide on my own that I do not want to be with someone who does not want to be with me 100%.
    I know he is confused because I am too. So I am not mad at him and I do not hate him, I just don’t know what to do anymore.

    Thanks for taking the time and reading this, I appreciate it.

    #125712
    abc123
    Participant

    I am also in similar situation. I am married twice. First husband meet with an accident after an year of marriage. Had son with him. After 9yrs got married again and saw literally hell with that husband. He himself left me went taking all my money after an year. But didn’t go for divorce yet. I Went in severe depression. My colleague who is 3yrs younger than me, knowing all my story proposed me. He was so caring, loving n used to support me in all. I too fell in love with him. We use to be more than a wife and husband for 3yrs. From 6months he is forced by his parents for marrying other girl. V both can’t live without each other. I am crying, shouting, fighting and pleading him to stay. He is also telling he will be with me life long though he marries other girl as he has all feelings only with me. He is boozing daily as he is not willing for marriage. I don’t know how to react. I am not able to accept the fact. My life is looking dark. Unable to concentrate on my work, soon and myself. Please help

    #125713
    Inky
    Participant

    Hi roxin,

    I love how when men break up with someone they imagine the girl pining away for them. Then they are genuinely surprised when she moves on or sleeps with someone before they do. You know in your heart that he only slept with some random girl so he could be “even”. He could literally have slept with anyone. Draw a name out of a hat. If it was a female over the age of eighteen he would have gone for it.

    It didn’t mean anything. Believe me.

    My advice: No matter how you feel, and no matter how he feels.. Even if you two have all the feels at the same time.. For your sanity and even his, have the rest of 2017 parade on without him. When (yes, when) he contacts you, even if it’s to say “I was wrong. And lucky girl ~ I’ve magnanimously decided to let you be my girlfriend again!” YOU say: “Hold that thought. Let’s talk about that this time next year.”

    That is enough time for him to appreciate you. And the price he must pay, IMHO.

    Blessings,

    Inky

    #125732
    Anonymous
    Guest

    * Dear abc123: this thread belongs to the Original Poster (OP): roxin. To start your own thread, click FORUMS, choose a CATEGORY, RELATIONSHIPS, I believe, then click Relationships, scroll down the page and post there. You can copy your above post and paste it there.

    Dear roxin:

    He was your best friend for a while but you fought a lot, at least at some point onward, and he wanted his freedom, you wrote- freedom from fighting?

    anita

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