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I need urgent help.suffering from depression.

HomeForumsRelationshipsI need urgent help.suffering from depression.

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Viewing 11 posts - 1 through 11 (of 11 total)
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  • #68245
    alice
    Participant

    I m 23.Six years ago in my high school i fell in love with a beautiful and intelligent girl.It first started with being friends.But gradually we fell in love and I was attracted to this girl like nuts.But we broke up within 3 months.Within those 3 months we formed a very intimate relationship except being physical.It was a very traumatic break up and i tried all sort of things to get her back but nothing worked out.I went into depression.I may sound like an awful person but I think that i will never get another beautiful girl like her in my life ever.I feel like a loser.I lust over her obsessively.I cant move on with my life.I have blocked her from my facebook page but i just cant imagine her with someone else.Please help I am not able to move on from the break up.I have lost all hope and confidence.Please help.

    #68249
    belove
    Participant

    Dear Alice,
    In youth, sometimes, life feels as though it is about this one person, and you can’t imagine life otherwise. But it’s really just a chapter in our life. Life is a series of lessons. Everyone who enters into our life is meant to teach us something about ourselves. You will learn more about yourself with each crisis you can survive. So, even though it feels like a crisis right now, it might be a blessing in disguise. You have all the strength in you to overcome this hard time. Just be very patient with yourself. This might be a chance for you to put less focus on relationships and more on you. Try a new hobby, try out that something you’ve always wanted to do. Might be it’s a call to move inward, to find who you truly are and what truly brings you joy. Everything happens for a reason. And the opposite is also true – something doesn’t happen for a reason. Sometimes, we are not meant to stay in a certain place because we are meant to walk through another door. This is hard, very hard. But it can be a time of self-reflection. Time to look into yourself and embrace all that you are and grow.

    Much love and warmth to you.

    • This reply was modified 9 years, 2 months ago by tinybuddha.
    #68278
    Ann
    Participant

    Dear Alice,
    I’ve been to hell and back and I totally understand what you’re going through.
    During that time, on my quest to heal my emotional hurt..I came across these videos.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vzk3EK6-690 (how to deal with a break up)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUOJzK2E-fM ( how to heal a broken heart )

    Answering the questions on the
    well being alignment page helped immensely.
    Please read the complete page and answer the questions at the end.

    http://www.wellbeingalignment.com/emotional-pain.html
    Sending you much love and lot’s of positive energy…

    http://www.wellbeingalignment.com/emotional-pain.html

    #68279
    Ann
    Participant

    Please watch the videos..I found them very helpful.
    They help you in understanding that all pain/ emotions are nothing but a thought you are having.
    And a thought is in YOUR control..there fore..so is your pain and suffering!

    #68280
    Anne
    Participant

    Depression is an awful thing to suffer from

    Have you been to see a doctor?

    #68315
    alice
    Participant

    Thank you so much for your support.Can you give me some advice on how can i stop thinking about her and should i fall in love ever again with someone else?

    #68327
    belove
    Participant

    Don’t think much about “how can i stop thinking about her”. What you fight, you actually give the power to. Allow these feelings. We all need time to heal after a crisis. Go out and run. Hit the gym. Or whatever else you can bring yourself to do. Release those good feeling chemicals with some physical activity. Just give it a try, you will build momentum on it. Even if you’re thinking about her while you’re out doing all this, it’s fine. Allow it. These thoughts of her will fade with time. You will begin to see things with a new attitude, new light. From a place of a healed heart, you’ll fall in love again. You really will.
    With much love.

    #68334
    mel
    Participant

    Hi Alice. Here is a video on how to stop thinking about someone. It is the same guy as the other videos suggested by Ann.

    #68364
    alice
    Participant

    Thank you so much for the kind support.But I have this constant thought of imagining her with someone else and feel a pain in my chest.I don’t know why but I get this sudden thought of her having a good time with somebody else and I am shattered.Can you help on how can I get over this thought and feeling?

    #68367
    PrApurvJ
    Participant

    Hello evryone,
    I am glad that I found this website.Its an amazing website.I would like to thank the founders for this amazing website.Read it’s history and it’s a huge success.Congratulations.
    Guys,even I need a help.
    I am 25 years old,post graduate student,pursuing specialistion in engineering.Soon getting married to the person i am in love since 7 years in presence of my family.Everything is happy and gloomy about my relationship.
    I am tensed with my relationship with my brother.He is elder than me by two years.I am attached to him,but his behaviour of being ignorant towards his job,my father who have provided us every luxury,every happiness,who is perfect,loving,kind,loyal and hardworking hurting me a lot.We stay together but I want to go away from him.My marriage will be after 5 months.I don’t understand how to handle myself in front of him.I don’t want to be rude,but his lazyness,his ignorance,his words that i don’t like to do a job and “earn for my living”hurts me all the time.I tried to motivate him,i have always supported him,but whatever he is doing is wrong i feel and i can’t support him anymore but i dont want to be rude to him anymore.
    Suggest something.

    #69444
    metta
    Participant

    Dear Alice,
    this is my first time visiting the site and read all the posts above; wonderful advice and I am sure I can benefit from those advice and videos as well. I will watch those videos later to learn from them as well. I am going to attempt to help u on this.
    1. you are very young, as belove hinted, and u have a lot ahead of you. thou it may not seem like it at the moment
    2. try to think outside the box. try not to think of this but think of something else that is similar; compare this with decision making. we make decisions everyday, every moment; when we have a difficult decision, it means the two items have a similar VALUE. think of it, if u like X more than Y, then naturally the decision is quick and easy. X is your choice but when X and Y are similar in value, the decision is harder. think of u going shopping and can only buy 1 item out of the 2.

    this decision can be difficult, some people will ignore it and let it be by not doing anything. Deer in headlights syndrome. Some will get stressed out and it leads to anger, frustration, and ultimately more suffering. or u can think outside the box and look at the problem objectively.

    you need to know you have a situation
    you need to know that you are in a difficult state that is causing you to be unable to function at your optimum state
    you need to let go and move forward.

    the hardest part is letting go and move forward but that is thinking outside the box. let go of what is expected of u, let go of what u believe to be the best thing in the world at that moment. If you believe this person is the most perfect person in the world. in your mind, u will have regrets and guilt cuz how can “I” let her go. But there are 7 billion people in this world. Let go and open your mind, u are still young and the world is a very big place. as you move on, u will grow and your opinions will change. u will meet other people. The best thing for now is to have fun; do something you enjoy, join a group, or create a gaming group. When you think of her or something reminds u of her, know that u are having those thoughts. eventually, it will go away but for now, enjoy life; enjoy your youth. have a joyful life because u have a choice.

    I wish you happiness and I sincerely hope this is useful. May you be happy! May we all be happy!

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