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Not good at anything!

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  • #145383
    Silly One
    Participant

    I’m 32, with just 5 years of work ex, with a bachelors in a good field. However, I hate my job, was forced into the field by parents at  an early age. For good professional growth, I need to go for masters. I don’t really want to, also I am not a good student anymore.

    I am kind of lost now. I only know what I don’t want.

    I have a good aptitude so I have taken the GRE and GMAT and scored well there. But the things is, I don’t know what to do now. I don’t have great GPA, I have average work ex, no good recommenders, I don’t know what to apply to.

    I suck at public speaking, networking and get EXTREMELY nervous in interviews (like there are actual physical manifestations, like diarrhoea and nausea).

    I don’t think I can study basic sciences again (Physics Chemistry Bio or Maths).

    I have no goals. I have tried the fake it till you make it approach for confidence and all. Nothing works for me.

    I give up in a single try.

    Maybe I don’t deserve everything that I think I do.

    Maybe I was supposed to be a failure.

    Maybe I am supposed to be happy with what I have.

    Is there even a point to life ? Esp MY life?

     

    #145455
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Silly One:

    The key sentence in your thread, for me, is: ” (I) was forced into the field by parents at  an early age”- “forced” is a strong word. And that is where the problem is, the original problem that created and still creates more and more problems for you along the way.

    The “fake it till you make it approach for confidence and all’- doesn’t work long term. Maybe at this or that isolated incident, but not as a life strategy.

    When you are forced into something, and keep doing that something, and that something takes so much of our times, years, as hard as we try, eventually we come to a stopping point where “nothing works” (your words), we “give up”, feel like “a failure, and wonder “Is there even a point to life ? Esp MY life?”

    I can gain more understanding of your mindset and life situation if you share about how did your parents force you into this field, at what age, and any relevant details to it.

    anita

     

     

    #145457
    pinchofattitude
    Participant

    Hey Silly One,

    All I can see is the list of all the negatives, where are the positives? I know that we all are good at something, not everything but something that is why we’re always learning. Nobody is destined to be a failure unless you choose to, everything you do in life is a choice.

    I don’t believe that you are not good at anything if you don’t know what you want yet in life that makes you happy, I would recommend that you do not invest in additional education until then.

    Ask yourself these questions:

    What makes me happy? (You said you do know what you don’t want, this means the opposite is what you want), what am I good at in my job?, what do I want in life that makes me satisfy? What do I have that most people don’t? (good friends? good health? good family?)

    There are many resources out there that can help you figure out what you want to do in life. The more energy you put focusing on what you hate, the more stuck you feel. Why don’t you try to change course and put that energy toward educating yourself through self-help books that will enlight you to what you are asking?

    Everything is a choice, so don’t feel that there is no way out, you are still young and nothing is too late until you choose to make it so.

    Cheers.

     

     

    #145561
    Velouria
    Participant

    Remember, you have intrinsic value as a soul in a human body. You’re were brave and determined to even come to this crazy planet to begin with, and you should be commended just for holding on and making it through. You don’t have to meet anyone’s expectations. Just be.

    #145575
    growingthrulife
    Participant

    Hey there, I just wanted to let you know that you’re not alone. This is something that’s happened to me personally, as well as friends and colleagues of mine.

    When you’re stuck in the midst of hating your career, it can become all encompassing, taking over your life – your career is linked so closely to your identity and when you’ve been “faking it till you make it”, it’s no wonder you’re facing such a predicament. But remember, you’re not trapped and you’ll never be trapped. You have talents, skills, experiences, knowledge and passions, it may be just be hard for you to recognise them right now.

    In modern society, we also fall into the trap of becoming slaves to our assets – I found it really helpful to work out what “essentials” I need financially, and worked backwards from there before embarking on my career change. I’m embarassed to say that throughout an 8 year professional “successful” career, I managed to acquire 58 pairs of shoes. Since quitting my corporate job, I’ve purchased one additional pair and that was out of necessity as all my old sneakers were no longer wearable. It just goes to show that the amount of money I thought I needed was not reality – instead I was purchasing goods as an attempt to seek fulfillment.

    Do you have a chance to take a holiday / a break from your current job? I really recommend that you take some time off for you. Get to know yourself again, find out what matters to you (not your parents!), determine your superpowers that you can offer to the world and start paving a way towards that goal.

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