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Opinions on being just friends?

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  • #122255
    Jas
    Participant

    Hi everyone, Looking for advice for a project I’m doing.
    I’m just wondering if anyone could offer me their opinion on being just friends with someone of the opposite sex. Does their sexuality or attractiveness play a role or their marital status?
    Thank you!

    • This topic was modified 7 years, 3 months ago by Jas.
    #122258
    Zachary
    Participant

    Hi Jas,
    I feel as though this is an important topic to touch on in general, and it is important to make some distinctions with this situation.
    Generally speaking I feel it is totally fine to be friends with someone of the opposite sex. This can sometimes flourish into a stronger relationship where sexual feelings are expressed and prevalent.
    What is important is to be open with how you feel about someone. It takes a lot of courage and self-esteem to do this. Relationships should be built on respecting the boundaries of others. If you feel a certain way towards someone and they do not feel the same way about you, this should by no means create a rift. It is really important to be able to express how you feel in any friendship or relationship without any sense of guilt.
    Sexuality, attractiveness, and marital status are all attributes of a person. The core of a healthy relationship is definitely built on mutual respect for one another. Ultimately, these three components can influence the connection, so yes they do play a role. However if feelings are discussed, the appropriate measures can be taken to set solid boundaries and maintain balance. Anger will directly result from imbalance, and ignoring the expression of your emotions ultimately leads to shaming yourself. In essence, you would be basically telling yourself that your emotions aren’t worth expressing to the other person, which is not a healthy behavior.
    Communication is key with this, and accepting how the relationship unfolds without setting expectations for the future. Remember to let go of control– establish and respect boundaries early on in the relationship. Let time take its course, and find comfort in the relationship being just as its meant to.

    Hoping I hit some key points here, and best of luck with your project!

    #122260
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Jas:

    I think it is a bad idea to be friends with a person of the opposite sex who is married, a one-to-one friendship, that is, separate and away from the spouse. Otherwise, to keep a friendship non-physical and non-romantic, you have to be aware of the circumstances of getting together with the friend. For example, if the two friends (of the opposite sex) spend an evening alone at home drinking, that may lead to physical intimacy.

    anita

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