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Relapse of some pain

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Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)
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  • #69353
    jdkm
    Participant

    Hear I go again.
    I’ve posted here a few times before – when I was in the midst of a breakup, with no hope of things getting better – and people’s care always helped. Lately I’ve even commented on a few posts, hoping to encourage others, because I had started to feel I was finally getting better. I am better, but my ex (of about a year now) is seeing someone else, and it still hurts quite a lot. I appreciate that he took time to get over our relationship, that he was careful and sensitive about letting me know, so I have no resentment. I like what I’ve seen of her and I do honestly hope he finds the happiness we had both tried to achieve by being together. But it hurts. It hurts quite a lot, because even though I’ve started to see how we can’t work even if we were to give it another go, I still miss him. And it hurts to know he’s treating someone else in the way he used to treat me – even though I don’t feel jealous of her, I simply look back and feel nostalgic.
    I know I’ll be ok (and I’m very proud of my progress – which some of you on this site helped so much) I’m just reaching out and sharing a little.
    JDKM

    #69360
    Anne
    Participant

    Ouch

    Yep, it always hurts when an ex gets a new someone. Meg Ryan tells it best in When Harry Met Sally 🙂

    #69366
    Matthew
    Participant

    Hi jdkm,

    There are some of us who are right there with you. I recently had a relationship end and tried to end things in the best way I could from my side. It was made all the harder for me because I’ve always been a pessimist and had to make a number of changes in my life to try to change my perspective and proceed forward in the healthiest way possible. I’ve never been that type of person but I didn’t want to be like that anymore. I forgave her for every thing I felt I needed to and wished her the best in life – so that I could walk away with no resentments myself. Even with all of that and the work I’ve done for myself, the thought of her dating another guy right now is still pretty painful so I definitely understand how you’re feeling. Ultimately I just wanted her to be happy but it still hurts knowing it won’t be with me. I think we can take solace in the comfort of knowing we are actively working towards progress and have done things to better ourselves when a lot of people would have done something toxic or destructive. Stay strong and keep progressing, thanks for sharing.

    #69495
    Achyheart
    Participant

    Ditto, Matthew and jdkm. My heart still aches and over a year has passed. I fear the day that I may learn of my Ex’s new relationship.

    Heart hugs to both of you. Give yourself and the pain lots of love and attention right now and remember that though we may be suffering, were also being given the opportunity to feel the rawness of emotion and the capacity of our hearts.

Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)

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