Dear Mr Ritz:

I re-read all your posts on this thread and some of mine corresponding with you and these are my thoughts:

Borrowing money- bad idea because you’ve been working on eliminating the debts you already have. Having no debt is important to you. Therefore not getting into new debt is the right thing for you. No one (almost) likes debt, but some people dislike it more than others and debt is very distressing to me as well as it is to you. So logically, no more debts.

Starting a business- other than the debt involved, lots of anxiety in it. Like I wrote to you before, the aim should be for you to experience well being, for you to be as comfortable as possible. A small business would entail learning a lot, taking risks, interacting with people.. doesn’t seem to me like a good idea at all.

Let’s say you are able, financially to stay home while your wife is still working. You expressed discomfort about staying home while she works. Well, there is no solution that will feel perfect. Compare the distress of X with the distress of Y and figure which is better. If you talk with your wife about staying home, maybe she will support you in such choice (after all your hard work to support your family, I think you deserve this…luxury!) – and maybe you can figure out how to communicate with people about it (none of their business since they don’t pay your bills!)

Regarding your current job- to keep going or quit? Again, it is the choice between two discomforts: the friction with co workers/ supervisors OR the distress about quitting a good paying job.

Please do post again.

anita