Hi Allison,
I was where you were ~ but without the new girlfriend..
The reply above put it best: It was “bewildering”. Bewildering is a perfect adjective.
I was all, “What the..?” as I was the one with “higher mate value” if you compare our stats on paper (on a very surface-y level, he actually had a lot going for him!). I did settle, though, I’m not going to lie. He chased me, I eventually let him get me, we were happy, then we coasted, then HE broke up with ME (!), I was inexplicably devastated, and I would see him wandering about campus positively HAPPY! I felt like I was carrying the grief for both of us.
Ironically, if I broke up with HIM, I would probably have been fine, and he would have been a bit of a mess.
Why?
Because being dumped/rejected triggers our primal and childhood abandonment issues. That’s all it is.
Say, “Yup, there’s that primal Abandonment Equals Annihilation fear again!” Or, “Hello, repressed childhood!”
Blessings,
Inky
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 