Hi ajack379,

I’m the same way. I need space. I jokingly say that I can live with anyone if I have 1,000 square feet around me. If not that, I need my own room.

Your GF knew this about you, and she STILL insisted that you move in together because of our culture’s nutty time schedule. Is moving in together a form of pre-engagement? Like the Promise Rings of old? I don’t know. But even when I was in my twenties I knew it was a bad idea.

Rule One: Never move in together. If you get married, there’s something about it energetically that makes sharing the same space easier to deal with. Just trust me on this.

OF COURSE you can’t easily break up with her when she’s living in your apartment. And NO ONE wants to break up while on vacation. And then the crying, the “Is something wrong?” I couldn’t stand it either!

The cheating: Don’t tell her. It may relieve your guilt, but it will cause her more pain. View the dalliance (it’s only an affair if you’re married, IMO) as a sign that you really weren’t happy.

Blessings,

Inky