Dear marie:

I can feel how sad you are, the sad faces you added in your post and the general tone is sad. You feel attached to him… he is your home in Australia. Good thing he stopped the weed- you did mention in August that he stopped for a while.

You know it is your life and your choice (not mine) whether to have him go to NZ with you. The trip to NZ with him may work out because if he starts fighting, you can throw him out of your family’s home! This may deter him, figuring he will have to sleep in the cold NZ outdoors because he doesn’t know anyone there.

You can make a preventative plan with him, if you resume the relationship with him, to avoid future fighting. Go step by step over the beginning, middle and end of previous fighting, the last one, and plan what to do different in each step.

anita