Hi Anita,
I’m in my early 40’s. I don’t think I would have thought about or considered doing this if I were a lot younger. Mostly because of my upbringing. But I have discovered that love isn’t something I can push into a box for one person and be done with it. I truly do not feel that I am a slut. I truly care about all of these men. They all add something to my life, but the biggest thing is that they don’t tie me down. I am free to explore life without inhibition or expectations. I have chosen this, but it wasn’t something I woke up one day and decided on. It was something I woke up to after gradually realizing that I had added lovers to my life but hadn’t subtracted them. In fact, I didn’t intend to have multiple lovers either. I enjoy pleasing and being pleased. And it is a rare man who can please me as often as I need it. In turn, I don’t expect any of these men to enjoy only me and no others. In fact if they tell me they only want that, I tend to cut them loose because that is too much pressure for me. They might fall in love. I might have to give up the others before I am ready to do that. In what I’ve seen, the poly-amorous have a primary partner and then add others to that – and I don’t and really have no desire for a primary. In fact the man I am considering as a primary I’m not even having sex with. He’s strictly platonic.
So I’m looking for thoughts on this. Any others who may have experienced something like this? Or considered it? Or wondering about it.
J.