Hi Anita,

Thank you for your understanding. Reading it now I can’t believe I didn’t realise what the problem was sooner.

The loss of my infatuation is definitely a defence mechanism, because I’m afraid she’ll break my heart.

She’s never been unkind to me whatsoever, but I feel she’s been harsh to other people before. I’ve heard stories about her mistreating her friends when she was in a relationship a couple of years ago, but it’s to my understanding that she doesn’t like talking about her past because she regrets it. I worry there’s a whole side to her I don’t understand, and undoubtedly a large portion of these feelings come from the fact that she’s as social as she is. She started speaking to me while in a relationship (though only as friends), and even though she wouldn’t have cheated, I have this insecurity that she might find someone better while we’re together. She has a lot of connections and doesn’t talk about herself nearly as much as I’d like her to.

I spoke to her for most of today and I’m almost certain that she likes me in that way, but I feel like she might need some time to get over her past relationship.

I was thinking of asking her to be my valentine. Neither of us really believe in the idea behind valentines day, which would make the occasion pretty easy going as we wouldn’t take it too seriously. I think the chances are she’d say yes, and seeing her one-to-one would be a great way to get to know her better, and it’s not committing to anything long-term yet. My only worry is that I feel somewhat unprepared given valentines day is in five days time.

Thanks again,

Harry