Inky,

I adore how you write, your emotional honesty is so wonderful… I can totally relate to being “freaked out” by the law of attraction, as I was also that way at first and am still always amazed at how easily it works and how when I set a “deliberate intention” for something… in fact that is really all you need to do each time. There should be no effort made to manifest what you want at all… Just say “I intend for ….to happen”…make it as specific as possible, and feel that thing happening on that day… that’s it. The only other trick to it, is that you cannot follow it up with any negative thoughts to the thing not happening. This will just cancel out your request. It’s not cheating, it’s the way this Universe was created out of Imagination, so of course it’s a Law that works for us. 🙂

Yes, we are all attached to the struggle, this is due to the EGO part of us. The Ego loves to eat drama for breakfast and will always try to ‘horrible-ize” everything in our lives and keep us down. When it runs out of drama, it will go to any length to create more drama until it is no longer hungry, until the next time. I have more info on this on the EGO my blog here… http://mayalifecoach.com/blog/

As for the rest of life, it always starts with us changing inwardly. The best way to start this process towards enlightenment is to “Fire the Judge (in us) and become the Witness Observer instead”…This means start with noticing/observing how you think, how you react, how you feel and how you behave in any given situation. Look at how old you feel in that moment, this will give an idea if you are reacting out of an old childhood wound or if you truly feel that way…when you do this, remember NOT to judge, just observe what goes on within you. The reason for this is that feelings are not right or wrong, they just are…

Next time you have communication with your family, try to remember to take note of how you feel, where you feel it in your body as this is where the energy of the feeling can get blocked…emotions are e-motion, or energy in motion. This energy is designed to keep flowing and not get blocked. If you don’t release this energy it eventually becomes blocked and turns to ill health.

I have an online self study course on my website for learning about the Law of Attraction if you or anyone is interested in that. You can find it here as well. http://mayalifecoach.com/law-of-attraction-self-study-course/

I hope any of this helps you and you are able to start the journey to a creating a peaceful and joyful life…

Create a wonderful day!

/j