hi anita and all
how are you? hope everything is fine =)
kind of becomes and habit that i update here, hope its ok to occupy some airtime from time to time
recently i have become quite close to someone, we always have a very light hearted, supportive conversation and i really enjoy her company. i never imagine myself being able to develeop feelings for someone who is 8 years younger than i am, but she surprised me on her maturity.
but not until recently did we talk about our relationship, she wanted to remain friends while i have told her i developed my liking and attachment on her. i appreciate the honesty and i also am happy that at least i got an answer for my question.
its been two weeks since we talked about it. she did ask if i want to adjust how we interacted, we basically txt everyday still, sometime more, sometime less depending on the day. i couldnt have a conclusion at the time and i kind of wanted to see how i would feel afterwards before any adjustment is made. but recently i feel the urge to cut the tie, primarily to cut off the attachment for her. for me, i dont txt a fd everyday, updating myself and each other’s life on a daily basis. i do want to recalibrate the relationship, i feel like she would be a good fd, if i could adjust the feeling.
but as i am preparing to initiate the conversation, i feel the insecurity bubbling, may be deep down i am afraid of losing it all, well, while i havent even got it.
i do doubt if this is necessary at time, but i am quite sure this is insecurity talking to me. and so as i think ahead, i am thinking what i need to do to prepare myself.
i did dream of my cheating ex, and kept thinking of reaching out to her these days, i think i am scared of losing this tie with this person would make me feel lonely etc
well but u guess its quite clear to me after i type it out, i just want some insight on how to better prepare myself if you can think of any idea.
well other than that, life is good. been jogging extensively and work wise i am progessing well, proud that my project is developing well
look forward to speak to you again

cheers
chau