The first part you wrote reminded me for some reason when I was on a ride when I was a little girl although I am not sure why. This memory has stuck with me. When I was on the ride I couldn’t figure out how to control the car everyone was yelling instructions. Someone bumped into me with their car and I just ignored the fact that I couldn’t operate the car and just laughed. I remember looking over at my grandmother and she just rolled her eyes. I remember feeling a little embarrased.

My family dealt with hurt with achohol, some with drugs, fights, anger, verbal abuse.

I have definately never been fully helped for my hurt.I have tried many things but have never found true empathy from anyone.

• I feel as if someone should care about me first. I can’t completely take care of myself because in reality I just don’t care but since I am trapped in me I have to feel the effects from my not being able to take care of myself.
• I would love to be able to take care of myself but I truly dont know how. I know the pain doesn’t go away but even though I have come to the conclusion that I do not know how to take care of myself I still feel I have sincerely tried and I would like someone to think enough of me to see that I get well.