As to the career path issue, I may have an idea. It may be because I dont want to be left behind by my peers who are getting farther/becoming more successful. One of the reasons why I tried law or medicine is that I may be able to catch up and such.

About the one who has to help heal/cure etc, it is the main duty of a doctor to do those and I guess it was one of the thoughts that plagued me. That I will and have to help people, at the sacrifice of my own. Presently, I need a lot of time just to reduce these symptoms, and if ever zI continue at some point, I may loose time to unwind for the sake of duty, and may implode on the stored stress/anxiety etc. So when I thought it does not have to be me, I got a feeling of comfort. That I dont need to pursue this. But still I need to do something to live and I dont have much of a choice.