Hi Gee,

I would reframe the situation in your head. Instead of thinking “I might be in love with him” think “I am very fond of him” instead. You can be very fond of a colleague. You can be very fond of someone who is married. The statement is true and not provokative, and you can look people in the eye and say your truth, even theoretically his wife. You can say to anyone who asks (they won’t), “Yes, I am very fond of (Tom).”

Try that sentence out for a while and see if it makes your angst go down.

Best,

Inky