Anita, thank you for always replying to me.

To your question: Yes, that would be nice. I’m dreaming about the day when it would be just like you described. Thinking about moving out gave me a reason to hope for the future.

Oh gosh, I had a dream today that I was looking for a new flat, and it was very quiet area. So new, so weird but nice. I think I’m very excited about this plan. I talked to couple of friends about it and they definitely say it’s the best idea. But I would never start planning this if it wasn’t for you.

My biggest dream is to longer want him in my life. Honestly I don’t think that would ever be possible.  I can’t see myself in the future not wanting him. I feel that, and it’s a fact, that nothing works.

I know this wouldn’t be a beginning of anything good, meeting him. Just a continuation of what’s already been happening.   Thank you for reminding me what’s obvious, I need those reminders.

I think deep inside I’m afraid to let him go, I don’t want my life without him because I think it will be pointless. So I feed this feeling every second so that it won’t fade. Do you know what I mean?