Mark: Thank you for your response! Your example “script” was very helpful and extremely similar to the one my therapist gave me. I actually did say this exact thing to my step mom and my dad. They just seemed confused (like they honestly had a hard time understanding why it was a big deal to only talk to their daughter on the phone a few times per year). They said, “Yeah, we’ll make an effort to contact you more.” On Easter my dad texted me saying he hoped my boyfriend and I were having a nice day… but that was a text. I just don’t understand why it’s so difficult to CALL me. Also on my birthday they will usually send a card in the mail (which is very nice), but there again they don’t CALL me. They send a text saying, “We know you probably have birthday plans today and didn’t want to bother you! Happy Birthday from us all at home!”

My therapist said if I want to talk to them on the phone once per month, I’ll have to make it very clear and say- “Will you please CALL me on the third Sunday of every month so we can keep in closer contact and keep our contact initiation fair?”

I’ve thought about this a lot and I’m afraid to even ask them because 1)  I honestly feel like a burden & 2) I fear we’ll do really well the first couple of months and then I’ll get my hopes up and it’ll go back to “Sorry we didn’t call, we’re just really busy right now, let’s talk next month… and then next month never happens.” 🙁