Dear Richard:

You wrote: “I have soooooo much guilt for not being able to help her get past the abuses of her childhood”. Applying logic, as you must have done yourself, you  know that you were not responsible for her childhood abuse: you weren’t there, correct?

So logically, you know you are not guilty for her childhood abuse and it is not your job to correct a wrong that you did not commit, by making it up to her.

But you feel guilty nonetheless.

If you would like to explore this guilt further, consider answering my questions:

1. Did she communicate to you in any way, during your relationship with her, that you are responsible for her happiness-or lack of?

2. When you were a child, did you need someone to help you and … there was no one to help you?

anita