Dear John:

The title of your thread is: “very confused- new girlfriend, ex girlfriend. Help me please”.

The following may help you with this very confusion. First the inconsistencies in your story regarding your relationships with your ex girlfriend and the current girlfriend:

1. You wrote about your one year relationship with your ex girlfriend: “Seriously we had 10 months of bliss, and 2 really bad months”.

This is not consistent with the following:

“our entire relationship I was always ‘waiting’ waiting for that next text or phone call, waiting to see her, waiting for her to tell me she missed me or loved me”- waiting during the entire relationship is not bliss.

“for the majority of the time we were together, there seemed to always be some drama and baggage in her life. We pushed through a lot of it together, but there was always something”

“She also had told me that she was sorry that she couldn’t make me happy. I told her that she did. And that I caused my own unhappiness.”

2. You wrote about your current girlfriend: “She is wonderful.. We get along great…… she is wonderful… I feel completely comfortable around her, and love hanging out with her.”

But then you wrote: “My current girlfriend has drama also, which is a huge red flag for me… She has kid/family/work/money issues right now. And I don’t need that again”- having “a huge red flag” is not consistent with feeling “completely comfortable around her”.

Second, my suggestions to help you to gain clarity:

As Shakespeare wrote: “To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man” – woman, in this case.

anita