Dear Rose:

I understand your motivation in telling him what your mother and brother said to you. He asked you to do that. I don’t think it is a good idea, but he asked you and you respected his request.

You wrote: “My family isn’t perfect. There’s good days and there are really bad days. Everyone has their own personality”-

I think it is tough enough for two personalities (you and your boyfriend at the time) to work well together. It often takes lots of time, increasing and improving communication, patience, gentleness, and so on.

For multiple personalities to work well together, that is way more difficult than two. It is as if the marriage planned was not only between you and him, but between your mother, your brother, his father, his.. him and you.

It is as if he needed every single person in his and your family to be okay with everything, the wedding itself, the venue, and so on. In reality, this is not a necessary to achieve, everyone’s agreement, everyone being okay.

“Dream OR Reality?”- my answer at this point: Dream, if the goal is to have perfect agreement by all members of the two families.

anita