Dear Azalia:

Part of you believes that you are a bad person (“makes me feel like I am a bad person”). You have a core belief that you are a bad person. So you are afraid to be found out. You live in a perceived dangerous situation, that at any moment, because of any random thing, he will find out that you are a bad person.

I know this core belief in myself and I experienced the compulsion to “confess” to anything and everything so to come clean, to expose any possible badness before it catches fire, so to speak, and destroys anything good.

My way through this is on one hand to pay attention to what I do, so that I approve of what I do, so that according to me, I am doing the right thing for myself and for others. On the other hand, I went back to my childhood to examine the origin of this core belief, when did it come about, how, why.

I hope to read more from you.

anita