Hi Anita

I think I am ready to post again.

Iv e had two instances in my young adult life (17 and 22) whereby I have felt strong sexual attraction but only realised it when I was in the dark with these men. The signs were there well before I experience the attraction so strongly. As well there was an established communication with these men once I felt attraction.

Speaking to my therapist about it, it seems like it’s because I am not in touch with my feelings at all and so only recognise attraction once I feel completely relaxed? I’m unsure…

Looking back the sexual attraction has come after curiosity the first guy I found very attractive physically and the second guy I found very emotionally compelling. He spoke and something about the way he spoke to me was so intriguing, surprising and attractive.

I guess I feel sad because of how disconnected I feel from my sexuality. Through dating I have realised I have huge barriers to face when dating men as I am prone to being very angry with them. Which is strange because surely I should be making my best efforts to attract them not to push and test. What gives?

Am I just perpetually traumatised by men. Or do i think I’m attracted to them and not actually So?

• This reply was modified 5 years, 10 months ago by afeels.