Hi Maggie,

Yes I feel you! I had the same thoughts too, I put myself in his wife’s shoes too, I felt shame as well to cheat on my husband, I feel shame to be a mother of my kids, I suppose to be a good model for them. And we have been trying to stop many times, but at the moment, I am the one who is struggle to move on. I cannot get over him, I did not ask him to do anything for me,  not even taking away his time too often for me, all I need is he loves me the way I do ! Just by knowing that is enough ! I even accept if he can love me and his wife at the same time, I never want to ask him to leave his family for me, I try to help him as much as I can, you see, all of what I’m trying to do is just to have him commit that he loves me too. But He could not , he told me he could not love two women at the same time, he wants to grow old with his family. You know when I heard that, I was deeply hurt and felt rejected, felt like my heart was played by him. And I took it as a punishment for cheating my husband. But still cannot get over him yet. He was honest with me , he did the right thing to stop for his family. We still have work related and I still have to face him once in a while.

So, I just wanted to share little more detail with you , you might find something or realize something , I don’t know , that might helps you feel better, less hurting!

I know its harder for you because you are vulnerable and lonely and his marriage situation (not happy with his wife)  that makes you still want him. But I guess at the moment, you cannot control the situation,  but you can focus on yourself, your well-being, overcome yourself . Then give it time, I know its easy said than done, but that’s all I can share with you. Hope you will find peace and feel less heavy

Sincerely