Yeah, if possible the guy’s parents move in.

Her suggestions were more along the lines of – we will not be able to help you financially if you fail – what i took from it is if i fail, it would also hurt my family as I saw myself as the one to support the family financially – but since i got my job i actually never had to do it, I did it on occassion when i wanted to.

And i have lived in fear all my life. I seriously fear even now not having enough money when I grow older. I also fear losing my job like my father did, so not doing well at work hurts me very badly – i feel like i am inching closer to my worst nightmare. And i would really like to be in a situation where i am skilled enough to earn the team’s respect. When some senior on the team is rude i am not able to convince myself that their rudeness is unwaranted and I keep telling myself i ought to be better but don’t do anything – this is might be because of fear – but physiologically and emotionally like you said earlier  it feels like helplessness.