Sadman11 your predicament  is not unlike the one I  had to deal with. There was a part of  me that mourned the me that could have been had I been loved and supported. I guess that I went through that period of feeling sorry for myself: “why did I get to have the crappy family?”. And in my case my life took a turn for the worst for many years , it is only now that I am  starting to make sense of everything. And I realized that everything is happening EXACTLY as it should.Life loves me so much it decided to heap on so much on my broad shoulders because it knew that I would find out who I really was. But it’s more than that: I believe of all us agree before we are born into this life what issues we are going to take on. So I have chosen to look at it this way: I am grateful for every single moment. I would have preferred it to be different,but  ultimately knowing that I chose it all to become who I was always deep inside has made it all worth it.

But with you consider the fact that if you have children or will have one day you can give them what your parents never gave you. You cannot change the past, but having a victim mentality will not help you make sense of things. Ultimately it would be lovely if our parents ushered us into the world safely and lovingly but that doesn’t happen often, because few people work on themselves before bringing children into  this world.  You are responsible for yourself and while you cannot travel back to rewrite history, you do have choices in the now.

How you view your narrative is something you can choose right now and what legacy to leave behind for your kids (if you have them or choose to have themin the future).If you do not want kids you still have the choice of what to choose what your life stood for.