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Reply To: Toxic Parents? Let it go

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#293995
Cora
Participant

My parents are very toxic sadly i didnt walk away from them when i could..i had many opportunities..but i was so unstable with jobs money and living on my own..my mother wants to blame me and say its my mental illness..she refuses to accept that she and my dad played a huge role in the way i think feel and believe about myself..when i was younger (i am 43 now) i wanted to work and move out and my mother yelled at me and said i will never maje it in tge world i will never have enough money and will never have money to support myself..she also said horrible things like no one will ever be there for you ever only i can take care of you no one else..so sad because as i look at how my life unfolded it was a replica of the beliefs she drilled in me..i am now out of work overweught bedridden and brain damage from psych drugs which i tried to tell everyone i cant take they damage my sleep so i can not sleep at night..my father very violent abusive psychotic he hit me a lot but is a screamer..it was stressful hearing him scream at me and my mom all the time he called me names and told me no one will want me in this world..here i am because i moved to my parents birthplace knowing ahead of time how bad of a place it is as i visited many times and exoreince cruelty as many of my relatives wouldnt speak to me over the years yet when i went there i was violently abused by coworkers two family members an aunt and uncle and my landlird his wife and also the people who lived there..i couldnt go shopping without the ladues giving me dirty looks and smashing their shopping cart against mine..so many are shock i moved to a place i knew was bad for me and i was warned since a child by those random people who found out my parents are from there and thet would tell me dont ever go there they will run you over and eat you alive. Sadly i almost didnt move and could have saved myself from trauma and ptsd and being on psych drugs which has taken my life away as i cant work anymore when you cant sleep..its that bad. Tge chemicals from these psych drugs damage my brain.

I am curious to know had i never moved away and i am writing to you now as if i never took psych drugs ever..what do you do if living with your parents so stressful for you and i wanted to cut ties from them years ago..how do you answer people who are so nosy when strangers coworkers customers who ask about your parents?? I a few times told people we dont talk..and i got yelled at..nobody stopped to think of my abuse even when i told them i was abused in some sick twisted way they act like i deserve it. How do you deal with that..what do you say to them? I get mad at them but didnt want to lose my job. When i talked to my coworkers who had no relatiinship with parents or one of them they looked at me strangely when i ask do people ask you about your parents and do they scold you if you give them an answer. They said no and no. Then why did i have to be an east target??