I think I struggle with self esteem issues and will often find myself in situations trying to win someone over who could care less about me.. There were times I thought yes he definitely loves me but then he’d pull stuff like this and I’d think there is no way he ever loved me..  He was very hot and cold with me and I think I almost became addicted to trying to win that love I was after from him which he’d share in little amounts here and there.  I can’t help but wonder was it me??? Did I bring out the worst in him and now he’ll go on to find someone that makes him happy who he’ll treat with respect? I want to see the good in people.