thank you marge, What did you do to ease your emotions and feelings when you went through your break up? I really feel crazy at times like nothing calms me. i dont want to sound weak are crazy but its a awful feeling. i know i need to push forward but going through the process is not easy.

Hi Chantel,

I think you just need to give yourself time. You’re attached to this man and you need to give yourself time to detach… detaching is painful so we tend to want to DO something to feel better immediately. So, like Anita said above, your mind thinks you made the wrong decision because being with him felt better than you feel right now, even though being with him felt bad, too…. BUT… if you give yourself time, as long as you need, to sit with your feelings and let them pass, they WILL pass, and then you’ll feel better than you even did when you were with him.

I understand the fear of being alone, but there are soooo many people out there. You’re bound to meet a good one who will give you a full relationship rather than a secret one, if that’s what you want. I really think you’ll feel better over time, it’s just not something you can really rush. It will also come in waves, where you feel bad and then good and then bad again, and then good again… but the bad waves become fewer and farther between, and if you expect them to come at some point, it doesn’t feel so bad when they do.

In the meantime, focus on doing things you know you enjoy and that make you feel happy. Do you like doing any arts? Crafts? Going to music shows or plays? Lots of times those things have huge therapeutic value and aid a ton in feeling better.