What you said here stuck out to me: “He is my everything, and I have lost myself in this relationship; but I would rather lose myself in him than be lost in a dangerous internet world.” Being lost as a girlfriend or being lost in random relationships are not the only two choices available to you! Maybe to be found, you need to take a different path than the two you’ve presented.

Final thought: in my personal experience, if your answer to “am I/was I in love” is “I’m not sure”? The actual answer is no. Real love has a certainty to it that is hard to ignore, and I’m sure in time you will find it, both within you and outside you.