Dear Felix,

I have a need to share something else with you, it’s about the kidney pain. It might be related to the fear you’re feeling at the moment, regarding everything you’re going through – existential fear related to your job, fear because of your dog’s illness, fear because you don’t feel supported by your parents (“my parents are monsters”).

It’s okay to feel fear. You’re not weak or less worthy because of that.

I am checking out of feeling sorry for myself and trying to figure things out.

You don’t need to feel sorry for yourself. However, it would help if you could feel compassion for yourself.

I think the difference between pity and compassion is that in pity, you look at your misery and see no way out, and you dig yourself even deeper. With compassion, you look at your misery, you see how you’re suffering, you feel empathy for yourself, but also, you know there’s a way out. With compassion, there’s always a way out. There’s hope. With pity, you stay in your pit (no pun intended…).

I wonder if you can sense the difference between self-pity and self-compassion? If so, do you think you can feel compassion for yourself right now? Just sit with your pain and feel compassion for yourself?