Hi Anita,

why don’t they teach her about what so many men out there are doing, lying to a woman, luring her in, and then… moving on without a second thought, why don’t they warn us???

I agree with you. I think if they had known how far I was in it, they probably would have. I did not tell them details about it, just that there is a person who wants to marry me. I did not expect him to break my trust and me ending up like this. They did not know I was continually in contact with him. May be they thought he was decent enough. He did come over home once with my friends. He is very good at keeping appearances in front of others to seem like the perfect guy. Had I not gone through this experience I would never have thought he was like this. That’s what seems so mind blowing, looking at him from outside I never would have realised how disgusting he really is. The only thing that mattered to him was ‘are my current needs getting satisfied’ irrespective of what happens to another person or what I promised before.

Even when he said I will talk to your parents about us during our talking days, I said I will talk and convince my parents, I was so foolish. I realised my foolishness at every step of this so called relationship only long after it was all over. My intuition did warn me this was not good, but I did not listen to it, did not understand it. My feelings of shame and disgust are still strong even though it has been 10 years now. I’m now 37, I can’t think of getting into a relationship for the fear of being used again. I also fear that any man who knows about this incident will want to have nothing to do with me.