Dear anita,

You can just reply me when you get back…

I’m gonna reply again because today i’m in my room and i keep wondering…. Which resulting me having these thoughts…

I feel like all of my insecurities are mostly not because of me, and i have to accept it…. Feels so unfair….

Like I didnt cause my dad’s family to be that messy which results in our family not contacting his siblings at all, and it’s not my fault that my mother is a single child because his dad is a single parents….. Those circumstances results in me having no cousins…. And every time i saw my friends hanging out happily with their cousins…. I get this feeling of sadness and jealousy…. And it’s not even my fault….

The same goes with my height and appearance…. I didnt ask for it….
But then i was born in this world, and have to live in it…. So terrible, i hate it…. I have no choice but to live and try to be happy with this given circumstances…. I’ll always have this deep hatred towards this world, always.