Hi Anita,

Thank you for your kind words. I can totally relate to being suspicious to kindness. If you’ve been subjected to abuse in any form you are just really waiting for the other shoe to drop.

You’re analysis hits spot on. I do feel like I’m drowning, the past couple of months was just a little too much for me to handle feeling like I am being atacked from all sides. And though it may not seem like it from these many many posts, this has actually been one of the best years of my life. The glimmers of this year means the world to me, I’ve experienced something I never had before 1) my first intimate (and safe) experience with a man, returning to the job in the country that I love and having such amazing collegues who accept me even with my C-ptsd, they are very supportive and that has been very healing.

I am feeling better than I was a month ago you and Tee has really helped me a lot. I too hope that New Year’s Eve will turn out better than I think too.