Dear Eric:

You are welcome. “I don’t think I’ll go and see a professional in this near time“- I am sorry to read this. I wish you looked for, and found quality counseling, so that you suffer way less than you have suffered for so long!

“Even when u avoid answering my obsessions. And I thank you for that. Due to sometimes u avoid answering my obsessions, my mind felt that it ‘can’t be discussed with anyone’. so it stopped thinking and gets tired by itself“- you are welcome and I will continue then to avoid answering your obsessions.. because it works!

“I agree with you that I have obsessive thoughts, and sometimes it leads me to be mad at myself which could cause me to scream or hit the wall due to that anger“- this is what I mean by you suffering: suffering from obsessive thinking that leads you to get so frustrated!

“I’m surrounded by a quiet surroundings, but what can I do? I’ve been living in this type of surroundings all my life“- in the quietness of your home, the voices within your head, aka obsessions, are screaming at you… so much so, that sometimes you “scream or hit the wall” in anger.

“I have a very hard time trusting anyone, especially when they praise me“- you can trust me when I praise you!

“I can say that I improved from last year regarding this anxiety, maybe because I’m more mature“- I am praising you for improving and maturing!!

“Tbh every time I overthink, after a day it tends to get calmer, idk why, either because my head is getting tired or I’m already distracted with a new worries“- if you didn’t overthink, you’d be calmer every day.

“Sometimes she questions me in a friendly way, like why did I fall for her so fast, and she’s worried that sometimes boys tend to leave when they get bored already, and she doesn’t want to feel a heartbreak… she’s afraid of heartbreaks, while me myself are also afraid of it“- she is like you, she worries too. I hope that she doesn’t overthink as badly as you do.. but she worries.

* Notice how she shares her worries with you in a friendly way: do the same when you share your worries with her.

“My head is exhausted because every single day I did my best for her, to make her feel happy around me. But I’m exhausted because I keep pushing myself to have an idea to make her happy. So does this mean I really need to see a professional, instead of telling my stories here?“- you can tell your stories here, but you should also see a quality professional (not just any professional). You are trying too hard and too much, and that’s not good for you, or for her.

“Anita, I know that you suffered from OCD as well. I wanna recover with my obsession slowly by understanding more about myself“- why don’t you read about OCD (and about social anxiety disorder) from online sources, maybe it will help you..?

“How I wish this girl can understand my concerns and feelings as u do anita, as you’ve followed me throughout the years. But idk if she knows about all of these worries. Will she still love me?“- I think that she already knows quite a bit about you and your worries…  and she loves you anyway, don’t you think?

* Reading your words right above made me feel very good, thank you!

anita