Hi Tee,

They did ask me if i ever tried it. They are know ed party girls but they only took right before i left, when drunk they change their personality a bit.

The not being invited is a wound a really need to attend to, because i still react quite strongly to it makes me really angry with him. Like i didn’t get friend zoned i got kicked out of the friend zone. And he keeps calling me by Nick name to me that’s what you do with friends, i mean after all he went five months without calling me anything and when he asked about me in the bar he used my full name. To me that’s like messing with my head. I hate myself for feeling this way. I wish i could just be over him by now this is too hard. I have been excluded soo many times it really hurts. And now seeing him talk so effordless with any woman at work, but not me. Like today he is joining the pretty girl and her two girlfriends who also work here for drinks and he was like yeah i will message you and it made me feel so sick(jaloux) she is so pretty and I don’t know if she likes him, definitly don’t feel like seeing with another person i know. Iwas doing so well where going to the bar on days that he was there drinking with some boys from work because I knew i would get anxious, was planned to do today but now I’m not since they are gonna drink together. I am so ashamed of myself, i should be proud of trying something outside my comfort zone (yoga session) but I didn’t expect it to be this hard and now i kinda regeret doing it. I feel like i don’t even wanna try and go out and meet someone else, i just had too much heart ache, maybe i am just suposed to just be alone.

Yeah he nearly got fired back in August so it is making life hard on him. He has a lot of issues, he lost 4 kilos in just one week, the drinking sometimes gets High, anxiety, he’s moved out of his mother house and into my colleagues house and his ocd is so bad that my colleagues girlfriend (who also works) here is nervous about living with him.