Good morning Tee,

Sound’s like a not boring at all and very challenging situation your in. It’s so crazy when many thing’s hit at once. I wish that you can be loose of your struggle soon and feel healthy. It feels light to read that you get a little hold on things and being able to have some control.

I need to contemplate some more on it

I got inspired by Peter Levine (and Vipassana) it’s worth to check him out if you’re not knowing him yet.

Congratulations on becoming a Snowboard teacher! I am glad you decided not to hide any more, and that it felt natural to be authentic, even though it was scary.

Thanks, I’m touched <3

Actually if we are in tune with our body, we are also in tune with our true needs. And with our intuition. So it makes sense that you would listen to your body and try to sense how you feel about something, and then do what feels right. Yeah, it makes sense to me.

I feel happy that it makes sense to you 🙂 I have been observing that when I’m in touch and I fall on a Skateboard it does not hurt it’s kind of a sweet pain. As soon as there is a slight pressure (my mind wants to take control). I get more stiff it hurts and I feel I can get injured. I belief if I’m patient to wait for risky things to do with confidence, trust and flow chances high I don’t get injured.

I think I have a similar experience with pain as you write here:

Wow, I too learned that I worry too much about my health and that it’s actually health anxiety. I also learned that when I am anxious, the body can’t heal so well, and the pain is stronger too. When I can stop fearing and freaking out, the pain diminishes too. So that’s been super helpful.

I’m not what is making my condition worse always the last 4 times I observed when I’m in pain there’s also guilt or abandonment around and not only as science say’s wrong movement. I might just feel this way because I belief it’s not good for me. Placebo is a deal and I’m scared but also it feels right to not take science too serious cause of the effect it has on my bodymind. It’s like it’s right for the thinking but wrong for the heart.

I hope I do not project my things onto you. I paid attention not to do that.