Hi Everyone

I thought I would update on what happened.

I did tell her I cant see her again, and walked away to save my sanity. I went to a very dark place, I didn’t look after myself, questioned my decision, drank to much. But I stuck to it and worked through everything, read many books and Tiny Buddha religiously.

I started working on my spiritual growth last November with a group, study Tolle and have started A Course in Miracles with them.

I struggled to find someone who I could accept, but rejected everyone for some reason, some pretty crazy.

Anyways, I went back to basics, started to like me again, got control of my life, stopped drinking and enjoyed life again. Practiced meditation, started yoga. Still felt guilty, but much more grounded. I now love who I am and realize I am the one responsible for my happiness, and I cant save her or make her happy.

Two weekends ago, I meet the most fantastic woman quit by chance, when I had given up finding a partner and stopped looking. We have had several dates, and enjoy each other tremendously.

Thank you everyone for posting their comments and their situations.