Hello Jay,

I am so glad you posted this.

First of all, you will always have this thoughts. With time, the thoughts may become lessen but you will have them. The difference will be whether you act on them when they come.

Now you may be wondering well how do I avoid them. Telling yourself you will do it, won’t help. It will be a process. If you really love this girl and you do want to be with her, then you have to take steps every day or weekly to control your actions whenever things won’t go smooth because that is a part of relationship. Here I recommend searching some suggestions to see what you can do to calm down when these thoughts arise like breathing in and out and then apply them daily or weekly whatever helps.

If you believe girl is toxic, then you need to let go. For example, my close friend only wants to meet over food. I dont want to spend money or eat out so much (unhealthy). I have told her this and recently she still recommended. Anyway, its my choice that I haven’t hang out it with her for 3 weeks and I won’t till we find other activity.

What do you want and go for it.

Passionate Self