HI David!
Thank you for your reply and your story. I feel practically the same as you..

The only difference is that I have relationship but he doesn’t, he’s alone for more than 1 year. He had told me a little about his last relationship before we falled in something deeper than just friends.. He said that he felt OK in this situation (without GF). Actually he’s very energetic, friendly and smiling person that’s why I loved him at first sight. Later he wrote that I changed his mind, he understand that he needs love and I’m the first girl from that time who made him feel in another way, happy..

He wants to visit my city, to come someday. And I want it 2 but on the other hand I’m afraid. I don’t know what could happen if he comes.

He made me think of my life in another way. Like is it my life that I live now? Is it what I want it to be? I’m a little older than 20 and my life is already like routine.. working all days, cooking, sometimes meeting with friends, sometimes going to the countryside, in few years I’ll marry my BF, will have a child or 2. And maybe it’s not so bad way to live but it’s routine, it’s like everybody live but are they happy? It’ boring, each day looks the same as another..

I always wanted to travel a lot, to see different countries, meet interesting people, know another cultures and my friend has the same desire but my BF not. He’s always working, working a lot, he doesn’t like travelling though for me he tries to love it.

Ahh that’s complicated question. I know it’s like two ways to choose: my soul and desire or confidence in 2morrow. My past experience made me need a lot in confidence so it’s gonna be very hard..

Best regards.